Monstaville Book II. Chapter 20

20

“May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.”

- George Carlin.

“A storm that rages like a fire in straw:

That is what the angry man is like.

Keep away from him, leave him alone.

God knows how to deal with him.”

- Amenemope (The Living Wisdom of Ancient Egypt by Christian Jacq, Simon & Schuster Ltd, London, U.K., 1998, p.134).

“If you neglect a problem it will bring a double load of difficulties.” (‘Stories of the Oases,’ ibid. p.137).

Mr. Johnson (Torin Thatcher): “It’s when you run away, you’re more likely to stumble.” (The Snows of Kilmanjaro, directed by Henry King, 1952).

“The first rule is to keep an uncontrolled spirit. The second rule is to look things in the face and know them for what they are.” - Marcus Aurelius.

In Search of the Miraculous. Volume 1 by Osho (Chapter 8, ‘The Decisive Moment is at Hand,’ 5 May 1970, Rajneesh Foundation, Pune, India, 1984).

But we are very clever, and we have our own clever devices. We are thieves and we dream of becoming philanthropists, and this is how these dreams help us to remain thieves everlastingly. Actually our dreams work like buffers that are there between two bogies of a railcar to absorb the shocks of movement. The buffers absorb the shocks and the passengers are protected from their hurts. Or dreams are like a shock absorber in a motorcar. As the car runs along a bumpy road, it absorbs the shocks and the gentleman in the car is saved from their hurt and discomfort. Similarly doctrines and principles work as buffers and shock absorbers in our life. I am a thief and I hold to the ideal of non-stealing. I am violent and I have nonviolence as my motto; I say nonviolence is the highest of religion. This ideal is my buffer, it helps me to remain violent. Because whenever I will be confronted with the fact of my violence, I will say to myself, ‘What violence? I am a believer in nonviolence; nonviolence is the highest religion for me. If I deviate from it sometimes, it is because I am weak; but I am going to attain to my ideal tomorrow or the day after. And even if I fail in this life, I am going to make it in the next. But non violence remains my guiding star.’

                Maybe, I carry the flag of nonviolence all over the world, and continue to be violent within. The flag is an aid to my violence.

                Wherever you come across a sticker saying nonviolence is of the highest, know it for sure that a violent person is around. There can be no other reason for a sign or a flag of nonviolence; it always comes with violent people. Nonviolence is a shield to hide violence and perpetuate it. Man has all sorts of devices, and only devices, so much so that he has lost himself in their crowd.

                To be sahaja, to be natural means: that which is, is: now there is no way to walk out of it; I have to live it; and I am going to live it, to be it.

                But this being and living with what is, is so painful that it is nearly impossible. Do you know what you will do if you are hurled in hell? You will find to your surprise that only with the help of your dreams can you live in hell. You will close your eyes and bury yourself with dreaming and dreaming. Have you fasted on a day? Then you know how you had to pass your day dreaming about food and food alone. Dreams about food help you to get through your fasting. If you stop dreaming you will have to terminate your fast immediately. But the dream that you are going to eat well the next morning sustains you through the fast.

                ...A violent person continues to be violent in the hope that he will be nonviolent someday. An angry person continues to be angry in the hope that he will be kindly and compassionate in the future. A thief continues to be a thief hoping that he will be generous later on. A sinner remains a sinner hoping that he will be virtuous the next day. These hopes are very irreligious. Be finished with them. What is, is. Know this what is and live with it. That which is, is a fact; live with that fact. Live with the facticity of your life.

                But to live with the fact is very arduous, hard and painful. It hurts the mind very much to think that I am not a good man.

“Sir, look: I am violent. I observe it. Because I don’t run away from it, I don’t suppress it, I don't transform it into something else as non -violence, which is absurd - the transformation of violence into nonviolence is stupidity, it has no meaning. So as I am violent, I let it come out - not in action. Let it flower, let it grow, as you watch it, it grows and dies. Haven’t you done all this? That is, sir, when you are angry, at that moment of anger you are not aware, you are full out. Then a second later you say, ‘I have been angry.’ Right? So you have divided yourself as not being angry and that you have been angry. So there is a division between the observer who says, ‘I have been angry, and I must not be angry.’ Right? So the division brings about conflict, saying, ‘I mustn't be angry, how am I to get rid of my anger’ - and so on and so on, so on. Whereas if you are aware of anger as it arises and let it come out non-verbally [laughs], non-actively, not say, ‘I am going to hit you’ - let it flower, let it come out, and you will see it disappears very quickly and withers away. And if you do it properly you are never angry again, finished.” – Jiddu Krishnamurti.

Gandhi (directed by Richard Attenborough, 1982).

Gandhi (Ben Kingsley): “I believe that non-cooperation with evil is a duty.”

He tells a group of Indian political figures not to let the British Raj take their self-respect away. “I am asking you to fight against their anger,” he says, “not provoke it...Show them their injustice, so it hurts - which fighting is supposed to do.” He tells them to refuse to comply, to take all the pain, the imprisonment, loss of possessions, and so forth. “They will have my dead body, not my obedience,” he says.

“Don’t let people, problems, and the pain in your past, pause your present, punish your person, prison your potential and paralyse your progress.” - Author unknown.

‘What do you say to a man who goes around fucking people’s lives up?’

“It is better to be violent, if there is violence in our hearts, than to put on the cloak of nonviolence to cover impotence.” – Gandhi.

‘Transform’ by the Daily Buddha (29 December 2006, www.thedailybuddha.com/?m=200612).

"Mahatma Gandhi provides a perfect example of how anger can be harnessed. As a young, unknown, brown-skinned lawyer travelling in South Africa on business, he was roughly thrown from the train because he refused to surrender his first-class ticket and move to the third-class compartment. He spent a cold, sleepless night on the railway platform.

               Later, he said this was the turning point of his life: for on that night, full of anger because of this personal injustice, as well as the countless injustices suffered by so many others every day in South Africa, he resolved not to rest until he had set those injustices right. On that night he conquered his anger and vowed to resist injustice, not by violence or retaliation, but through the loving power of nonviolent resistance, which elevates the consciousness of both oppressed and oppressor.

               We may never be called on to liberate a people or lead a vast nation, but Gandhi's example can apply in a small way in our own lives, when we decide to return goodwill for ill will, love for hatred, in the innumerable little acts of daily life."

"I have learned through bitter experience the one supreme lesson to conserve my anger, and as heat conserved is transmuted into energy, even so our anger controlled can be transmuted into a power that can move the world." - Mahatma Gandhi.

Master Kan (Philip Ahn): Those who speak convincingly of peace cannot go armed. Those who speak convincingly of peace must not be weak. So, we make every finger a dagger, every arm a spear, and every open hand an axe or sword.

                - Kung Fu (Season 1, Episode 13, ‘The Stone,’ 1973).

“Nonviolence means avoiding not only external physical violence but also internal violence of spirit. You not only refuse to shoot a man, but you refuse to hate him.” - Martin Luther King.

“You’ve got to try and work your own head out, you know, and get nonviolent. It’s pretty hard ‘cause we’re all violent inside, we’re all violent inside, we’re all Hitler inside, we’re all Christ inside and it’s just to work on the good bit of you.” - John Lennon (Interview with Jerry Levitan, aged 14, in Toronto, 1969).

The Divine Melody by Osho (Chapter 8, ‘Trust is a touchstone,’ 8 January 1977, Buddha Hall, Rajneesh Foundation, Pune, India, 1978).

Poverty is not the root, greed is the root. Poverty is the outcome. You go on fighting with poverty - nothing will happen. Greed is the root; the greed has to be uprooted. War is not the problem, individual aggressiveness is the problem - war is just the total. You go on doing protest marches, and war is not going to be stopped. That doesn't matter - your protest marches, everything - you can enjoy the fun. There are a few people who enjoy the fun; you can find them in any protest march. You can ask Astha - her mother and her father have both been protesters. Anywhere you will find them protesting; all over the world her mother goes on rotting, protesting against everything. It is fun - you may have also enjoyed it.

                In my childhood, I used to enjoy it very much. I was in every procession, and even the elders of my town started worrying. They said, ‘You are everywhere - whether it is a communist procession or a socialist or a congress...anti-communist...you are there.’ I said, ‘I enjoy the fun. I'm not worried about the political philosophy - just shouting is so much fun; I enjoy the exercise.’

                You can enjoy; it does not make much difference - war goes on. And if you look at these protesters you will see these are very aggressive people - you will not see peace on their faces. They are ready to fight. Peace-protest marches any moment turn into riots. These are aggressive people - in the name of peace they are showing their aggression. They are ready to fight: if they have power, if they have the atom bomb, they will drop the atom bomb to create peace. That's what all politicians say - they say they are fighting so that peace can prevail.

                The problem is not war, and Bertrand Russells are not going to help. The problem is inner aggression in individuals. People are not at ease within themselves, hence war has to exist - otherwise these people will go mad.

In a ‘Fish Tales’ cartoon by Mark Grant, a man encounters a shark carrying a sign that reads, ‘Vote Psycho.’ He comments: “You’re not going to get very far in politics with a name like ‘Psycho,’” and asks, “What’s your surname?” To which the shark answers, ‘Path.’

Ray Elwood (Joaquin Phoenix): "’When there is peace, the warlike man attacks himself’ - that's Nietzsche, and his point is that there really is no peace. There's always some war, somewhere, with someone. And there are no winners or losers either...just those who are still around to fight another day.” (Buffalo Soldiers, directed by Gregor Jordan, 2001).

Pigsy is forcing my violent reactions to the surface to be dealt with. They are co-habiting with my spiritual expression of love and peace. They can’t co-exist. They can’t both be expressed. It’s a war between two sides of myself. One must win. The will to peace is gaining more and more peace as the will to violence surfaces but is rejected through reason and truth. It is dying whilst my dedication to peace is growing.

I am the one who is powerful here, like a parent: my presence keeps everything stable - so there is no danger. Patience!

Pigsy just lies. The day after the knife incident, he knocked on my door, scaring the hell out of me again, and offered me a slice of Christmas cake on a plate. I had already decided that if he should knock on my door the best course of action would be to open it because he could always kick the door in or attack me later on if he really wanted to.  He said to me: ‘I’m sorry for what I done but I didn’t like what you did.’ So he knew. Just stay away from him please.

Pigsy - Frankenstein’s Monster - is living in Hell. That is his state of mind. I must live in Heaven - as my state of mind. When dark forces attack those who have Light the only answer must be to express even more Light. That is the Light’s natural response When on the receiving end of destructive energy it is only by expressing more creative power than one can remain centred in the Light and never falter from the experience and reality of one’s true Being. We human beings are fallible but this is the ideal to which we should strive.

“When the fiat ‘create!’ went forth, it was the signal of God’s gift of freedom to man. Therefore, man should be free to create; moreover, he should be free to create without condemnation. To insure his freedom from the impinging thoughts of others, the matrices of his mind must become receptive to and fortified by the thoughts of God and there must be spaces in the time of the day when, apart from the creating of the cloud [the practice that is the main theme of the book], the alchemist attunes with the mind of God and drinks in the fragrance of his being. True alchemy draws man close to God and to his Christ, and it enables him to fulfill the ancient fiats ‘Man, know thyself!’ ‘Create!’ and ‘Take dominion!’” - St. Germain (Intermediate Studies in Alchemy, channelled through Mark L. Prophet, Summit University Press, 1971, MT., U.S., p.50).

[K] said something interesting: that I’ve now said that Pigsy respects me for so he has eased off - like [R]’s fight - the guy respected him because he won the fight and in willingly taking part spoke his language. So, perhaps he respects the fact that I haven’t move, have a couple of dangerous friends, have ignored his intimidation and also that I am now actually learning to fight.

“If they respect you, respect them. If they disrespect you, still respect them. Do not allow the actions of others to decrease your good manners, because you represent yourself, not others.” - Mohammad Zeyara.

He is permanently concerned about/aware of my presence. He wants interaction: if not good - on his level - then bad. He has no self-control. He is pushing to a conclusion. But, it is a test for me not to react, to forget him, to strengthen my own being. People want to make their problems your problems! They think that by imposing their problems on you, you will have them, as if they are already yours not theirs, which they are, since we are all one, but...

I never had a problem with people trusting me because I never knew my own power before. Now I have it, suddenly no one trusts me and people attack me in order to gauge my reaction, to see if I can be trusted or not. But it’s like they are sure I can’t be trusted! So they push me until I do react so they can then satisfy their suspicions and also enjoy attacking and intimidating me - feeling justified, appeasing their consciences: convinced I am savage, they enjoy releasing their own savage beasts and feel justified, even morally superior for doing so!

They misinterpret my mental/emotional/spiritual power. In fact, I am ‘transparent,’ as someone (a young man who was black and gay!) once called me. All that I am, good or bad, conscious or unconscious, is somehow visible. This is partly emphasised by my natural openness and honesty. People often say I am like a child, that I am a young man in a man’s body...that part of me having been preserved albeit in a damaged condition and hiding in a corner in fear.

People try to manipulate others. They are testing your responses...they feel comfortable with you if you respond in the familiar way that they expect. They want to know that you are weak and ‘human’ like them so they do not feel so insecure with you, so they can relax and overcome their fears. Being both independent and intuitive, I usually sense when people are trying to manipulate me and being a rebel my instinct is to not play ball. It is a mental choice: I can go with the emotional response if I want to, if I feel that is right for me, for them, for the situation, or whatever, but I am not obliged to respond at all. I am not ruled by my subconscious. I am a complete individual with my own identity, thank you. OK, so I don’t embrace people emotionally enough (I’m English after all!). But, I have a degree of self-control and I apply reason to relationships with people. Ultimately, I am centred in the being that is me and therefore do not run with the herd or conform to others’ expectations just so they can feel safe or comfortable. I expect to be trusted as an individual not because my personality reflects the familiar social language upon which others depend. They hate anyone to be different because they fear the unknown and they do not want to grow for that requires much suffering if the truth be known.

“When you are at peace with yourself and you love your self, it's virtually
impossible for you to do things to yourself that are destructive.
When you get enough inner peace and feel really positive about yourself, it's
almost impossible for you to be controlled or manipulated by anyone
else.
The more you extend kindness to yourself, the more it will become your natural response to others.”

- Dr. Wayne Dyer.

Perhaps people attune to a more dangerous me in a past life and combine that with the power I now have in this life: put two and two together somehow and arrive at, ‘He’s Dracula, let’s get him, let’s drive a wooden stake through his heart!’

Pigsy tried to release his emotional poison by pressing my buttons and trying to find my weaknesses any holes through which I would receive or accept it. He wanted an emotionally toxic relationship (in which he has the power and can show off to his girlfriend!) To find/release self-destructive poison in me and to relieve his own stress on me, pissing on me (even though temporary and likely to feed and increase it so he can get off on greater negative energy which he can blame on me - and blame me - and blame everything on me as his scapegoat), and also impress his woman that he’s powerful and ‘strong’ (i.e. weak and violent!). Basically, the more positive and peaceful I am (and the energy of my flat) the more he is stuck with his own shit because it just gets sanitised and can’t spread everywhere, connect with me and look like I have created it. That’s how I win that game. Like, hey, this is what we’re doing, playing this game where I have all the power because the other guy is afraid of me. His brain can’t delve any deeper than that and he probably hasn’t met many people who think for themselves before.

Just like in India: at home, you have to be careful of the vipers and scorpions on the ground. I have to be careful of the aggressive, poisonous Pig Monster upstairs! He is like a dinosaur (even looks like one!). Tyrannosaurus Rex.

“When someone criticises or disagrees with you, a small ant of hatred and antagonism is born in your heart. If you do not squash that ant at once, it might grow into a snake, or even a dragon.” - Rumi, Masnavi II: 3467-72 (Rumi: A Spiritual Treasury, compiled by Juliet Mabey, Oneworld Publications, Oxford, U.K., 2000).

A woman regarding nasty men: “They make you feel guilt for something they’ve done.”

Retrospective inserts.

Mark Passio says that the Sacred Feminine is represented by the feathers of the quetzl bird, which signifies higher consciousness and non-aggression. The venomous serpent, the coatl, represents the Sacred Masculine principle of self-defence, “Striking if your natural law rights are violated illegally.” (Natural Law Seminar at the Omni Hotel, New Haven, Connecticut, 19 October 2013).

“So you’re seeing more of a Gandhi approach to a peaceful protest, if you will, going on. And yet the Indigos, I find, really need our help in learning how to channel their anger constructively. When you have an Indigo in your classroom, or if you’re a parent of an Indigo, the point is not to reduce their anger. The point is not to squelch their anger. The point is to learn how to channel the energy – the beautiful energy of existential angst, or existential anger. Channel it constructively.

                So, in my opinion, the Indigos need to learn how to perform peaceful acts of activism. Things like letters to the editor, getting involved in committees on a very local level, such as city councils [and starting their own projects]…They also need to learn how to learn not to be self-destructive with this anger that they feel [not becoming violent because they feel frustrated and chaotic, or cutting themselves, or attempting suicide]. They’re angry for a good reason and I believe that anger can be used in the way that we’ve seen – like in Dr. Martin Luther King – that it can champion a cause that can make the world a better place. And it can be done with a great deal of love through things like Gandhi taught us like passive resistance or Dr. Martin Luther King’s Junior’s work with boycotting any business that is not in alignment with our principles.” – Doreen Virtue.

Jessica Mystic, as always, explains beautifully and with simple clarity that the Indigos are ‘system-busters who have incarnated with a chip on their shoulder. Some are in gangs, she adds. They have a lot of anger that they’re “working towards transmuting. And, once they do, they go to this unconditional love state and they go into Crystal which is basically a merging and balancing of all the chakras.” (‘A Fireside Chat with Zany Mystic,’ 14 March 2009, www.bbsradio.com and www.jessicamystic.ca).

It could be that all this darkness was created by young souls and that the starseeds have come to help shift it by deliberately manufacturing their own karmic plans which would eventually lead to this potent epoch in which we are reawakening to Light and somehow or other loving and releasing the heavy burdens we have undertaken (one potato at a time!). It is essentially the Indigo souls who have come as warriors to remember the truth to some degree that they deserve a better life than the one on offer in the corrupt societies of the Old World Order. Without this revolution and the return of Light at this time, the Elite’s vision of a New World Order in the form of a global totalitarian state might well have been realised. There are sufficient numbers of people who, through an innate sense of their own inner power, confidence and self-worth, reject such a poor quality of existence and their responses range from angry resistance to awakening the Christ love residing within the heartspace. On the outside, they may be bravely facing apparently insurmountable odds, like ships wrecked by storms raging mercilessly. They may even have resorted to drug addiction. Deep down, however, they know the self-love which is to be expected of spiritual royalty. There is an inner flame deep within the cavern of the heart which cannot be extinguished, a faith and self-esteem which is ready to burn brightly once again in the right conditions and when their focus shifts from the outer world of illusory darkness to the inner world of the spirit.

On Gandhi’s peaceful non-compliance, Joe Marshalla says that the Mahatma just “said matter-of-factly, ‘the British are going to leave’” and they will leave as friends. People say, “‘It’s them that we don’t like.’” But, “I’m here to say there is no them. The ‘that’ which we see outside ourselves that we don’t like is in fact an extension of that which we have not accepted about ourselves as individuals.”- (‘The Mechanics of Mind Control,’ a lecture recorded live at Brave New Books, Austin Texas, 9 October 2008. Source: Google Video).

The Indigos’ demand for sovereignty influences the collective consciousness and generates a desire in others to reclaiming their power and dignity. Thus, their karma places them in circumstances where they rebel and instantly fire intense emotions into the Earth’s magnetic grid to assist in raising people’s awareness and expectations. Space is opened up for others people to question authority and challenge the status quo instead of remaining inert and adding to the pile of collective fear in the world. It is a clean-up job, one might say. Incidentally, St. Germain was telling us about a guy in Canada who works as a dustman and is fully conscious of the task he has chosen to perform in this lifetime; that is, clearing away negative energy from people and their homes. We each have a part to play in this challenging game. The Indigo Revolution is a bridge to the new world that will be created by the Crystal Masters whom, through full Christ consciousness, simply love everything and everyone regardless, like little rays of sunshine who know they are the Sun, the Light of the Source.

"He who does not see God in the next person he meets need look no further." - Mohandas K. Gandhi.

That is, it is in there somewhere. Although you may be far from being a Master, the Source is there beyond all your false beliefs about who you are. We are never separate from God. However, we can be lost in our projections, our holographic incarnations, our egos, our badass Dr. Who costumes.

“Exercise: for ‘when you choose to take the action of giving love’ – say ‘God, I know you are hiding in there. I’m going to send love to you, hiding in that body, in that personality, in that person with a name, a form. You can be honest – say, ‘I cannot see you, yet St. Germain said you are there. You are the indweller of all beings. And I’m going to keep sending this love to you and I will not stop. Then you bypass the personality. And, you will be surprised what you will get from that action, with that intention, how your life will transform, how your sufferings will ease, how abundance will flow, lack will disappear…We have said it. We will say it again and again and again. Love is the key to transform your world. Stop your anti-war rallies, then start love rallies. Give no attention to that which you choose to transform. Give full attention to that which you choose to anchor and be and become. That is a master’s tool. Use it if you like. Deep breath.” – St. Germain (channelled through Ashamarae McNamara, ‘St. Germain: The Key, Pt 2,’ YouTube video, posted by messagesfromwithin, 25 July 2008, www.awakeningfromwithin.com).

"The True Philosopher sees in each a fellow seeking after God." - Unknown Philosopher.

In Lak'ech: I am another yourself. I am you and you are me (Mayan).
Ek Ong Kar: The Creator and Creation are One (Sikh).
Mitakuye Oyasin: We are all Relations (Lakota).

Retrospective note (20 August 2009): Allowing yourself to get upset with your intimidators, protesting, shouting and swearing at the neighbours (during intensive noise disturbance campaigns – in which they are partly attacking me aggressively and selfishly declaring that they can do what the hell they like - I have even sworn at them a couple of times outside in a desperate attempt to deter them from keeping me awake at night and this seemed to be effective because, although they laughed to each other, they did not want to risk their children overhearing I think) is giving them attention, feeding their negative energy and destructive emotions. Even if you have succeeded in silencing them you’ve already nurtured the seeds of the next campaign of selfish disturbance and hostility. You need to focus with even more will and love on what you choose to be and do and be grateful for the chance to meet this challenge of self-mastery. View it as a sacred, spiritual initiation. For, that is what it is. Perhaps the only way to avoid repressing your emotions when you ignore them and try to stay focussed on what you are doing is to feel in your heart, endeavour to feel love and turn within, calling to your spirit, to God/Goddess, to the Source, to any being of Light, for some form of guidance or assistance. It is difficult however since the extreme onslaught to the senses externally has a dramatic impact in contrast to the subtle and less immediate, even imperceptible, Light that you might receive through your heart, particularly if this is not a frequent practice. Ultimately, it is something one ought to do each and every moment of course and this might well produce a state of consciousness that transcends practice, a state of true self-mastery.

Life without love is death:

“Quien camina una milla sin amor, se dirige a su propio funeral, envuelto en su propia mortaja” (Those who walk a mile without love attend their own funeral, dressed in their own shroud).

AWhat soap is to the body, laughter is to the soul.@ - Yiddish Proverb.