An Overview of the Monstaville Trilogy

by Antraeus de Herschia

Book 1: Notes from my journal and other writings, 2002 
(including two essays written later: ‘Mockingbird Heights’ and ‘Sleeping Beauty’)

Book 2: Notes from my journal and other writings, 2003 to 2004, plus notes from the end of my journal, 2005 (Including ‘Black to the Future’ 1 to 6, written later)

Book 3: Notes written after my journal and other writings, 2005 to 2012

“Success is when you realise obstacles you face are challenges to help you become better – and your response equals the challenge.” – Stephen Covey.

The principle of perpetual duality of light and dark that can be found in Gnosticism is a patriarchal injection and not true to its core truths. In this age of rational materialism in which we live, Carl Jung helped to reintroduce to Western consciousness, this intrinsic value of our darker sides. For, they hold the key to our Light. As we allow ourselves to feel through our experiences and release the emotions associated with our subconscious and personalities we open the way for further self-discovery. Contrary to patriarchy-governed Christianity’s demonisation of the left-hand path, Gnosticism shows us that we must achieve a balance between the path of the Goddess (left) and that of God (right) and that dark and light each have a role to play in our rebirth into the realms of Light. For, we must face ourselves, warts and all, destroy and transmute the instinctive and irrational projections of the shadow self by shining the Light of our love and awareness on them. And we cannot accomplish this feat while this part of ourselves remains hidden and is holding us back from aligning our consciousness with the divine beings we truly are.

Good day! I wish I could report that the contents of this book are the surreal meanderings of the Squire of Knotty Ash who got stoned one day and made it all up! Alas…

During the course of my experiences and reflections as shared on these pages I discovered a deeper reason for my trials and tribulations. And that is that my long-term crisis is symptomatic of having somehow purchased a ticket for the Ascension Express and climbed onboard like a foolhardy clown who, to most members of society, probably belongs in a padded cell! Ascension is a step-by-step process of self-healing in which we cure ourselves of the cherished delusions we have held snugly to our breasts for many lifetimes. It is a return to Truth and Freedom. It is also an activation on many levels with the goal of living impeccably as clear channels for our higher selves, keeping our four bodies balanced and in a healthy state and (re)building our Light bodies, knowing that, rather than being separate, the ego is a point of consciousness within the greater, whole Self. Self-awakening occurs when the ego is purified of its distortions.

I would therefore like to introduce these three books with a pertinent overview. The reason for my experiences and the value of these books is that they relate to our very reason for being here. We each must shift, somehow, from the illusion of appearances and our instinctive and habitual reaction to them to the Reality of perpetual Love and Light. These books could be defined as a primer for each person who has yet to consider the significance of unconditional love let alone begin to practice it or, rather, become it.

Energetically, we are clearing our lower three chakras of blocked energies which keep our hearts closed. And, as Sananda reminds us, the heart has many levels and the deeper we are able to feel within our hearts, the closer we come to our true Self residing within. I get the impression that, even as the higher chakras may open, we still have this inner work to do to experience outward projections of these patterns and clear them by letting go of the emotions with which we associate them. In other words, for many spiritually-inclined people opening the higher chakras is the easy part. Yet, progress beyond a certain point (probably the 8th chakra) is constrained by hydra-headed phantoms from the past which may pull us down again until we are able to let go of them once-and-for-all. Shadows reappear until they are completely consumed by the Light.

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do hat. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." - Martin Luther King, Jr.

A wise friend says that ‘Hate is really love in pain.’ Does love conquer hate? That depends on the power of the love we offer. Until we reveal our full buddhahood, some people respond to love and some are stuck so far down the sewer of hateful pain that love cannot reach them and it is perhaps best to leave them to it, and perhaps send some love energy they can receive when they're ready. In the meantime, we can be love and love everything and allow love to illumine the dark and fry some demons lurking within ourselves. We can then shine brighter and raise the planet's vibration so that there is no longer any temporary hiding from universal law and such behaviour can no longer be expressed here. Love is Everything. It is the energy of Source that brings us joy and freedom, that makes all One. As we shine our love our shadow self is revealed. It is more conspicuous, and it appears in our lives in the form of haters (“you know the old saying, haters gonna hate”). These are the tests of awakening and beyond which we learn not to allow the ego-mind to respond at all but remain true to our real Self immune to the box of illusions all around us.

“By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest.” - Confucius.

Life is a series of initiations. We are in this school of 3D Earth as human beings to achieve self-mastery, to “BECOME the Great Balance of his or her Higher Self, which is completely free from lower energies and their effects,” as St. Germain explains (channelled through Henry David Stites, 29 January 2012, See Appendix XII). For, as long as we “are disturbed by outer conditions or energies,” he adds, it shows, sadly, that we are not fully accepting who we really Are as angelic beings. En route to remembering our true nature as high frequency beings of Light, we resemble chicks hatching from the egg of illusion which would have us believe that everything conjured up within it is real. Finally, we get to take our first steps and stretch our wings as fully-grown birds before restoring our awareness as the angelic entities we were all along: in Reality.

In our lives, particularly as we absorb the higher frequencies that are returning now, we are presented with many opportunities to free ourselves from the prison that was once our safe haven: the egg of self-denial. We are repeatedly presented with the jagged forms that we have yet to see for what they are and to which we therefore continue to react. It is not really they that are moving but us. As we move so do they appear to follow us and loom closer and larger than ever as the Light of Reality into which we are emerging reveals inner conditions in outer shapes, as initiations we must pass in order to expand our self-awareness and outgrow the box.

The ‘monsters’ outside of us are all projections of the shadow self that play upon the wall of our lives. The more attention and credibility we give them the more real they appear to become, defined or set in stone as it were by the ego’s fears and frustrations. As the egg breaks so we slowly emerge into the Light. At the same time, however, there is a gradual path, or series of gates, to new life as the darkness in which we were once comfortably encased, living life through the subconscious mind, no longer supports our cradle of false beliefs. We are growing wings and our awareness is outgrowing our delusions. As we hatch from the egg so are rough, sharp, menacing shadows cast all around us, now appearing upon us, now behind or to the side, below or above us. These teeth that the once cosy shell (the unbroken spell) now bares are the inevitable phantoms of our own unresolved, unloved darkness. Inner distortions of reality now become outer expressions which push our buttons and they will push us around until we are able to see through them, until we no longer react to them emotionally because of something blocked or lacking in us.

When we react to people, for example, it suggests that there exists a barrier created by the ego-mind which protects it from the Light of the Self. So, somehow, we must recognise these barriers or learn to use a higher perspective to pass above or around these blockades. We must, according to St. Germain, learn to forgive and accept ourselves and the world, move beyond egoic constructs such as pride and judgement and look within to find the source of our troubles. He implores us to, “Become the Masters you are in Truth, and put aside your inner and outer phantasms that bring your energy vibration down from the level of the True Self. Accept yourself at this level, FULLY, and outer conditions will either change or cease to have any power over your Joyous and Bright Soul-Light.” (ibid).

This ‘danse macabre,’ in which these skeletons, as aspects of our shadow self, have leapt out of the closet and appear to have a life of their own, persists for as long as we “continue to be disturbed by their energetic vibration.” This is an important aspect of the Ascension process that few people have documented as yet. Few people, to date, it seems, have passed through this House of Horrors and arrived at the other end. Yet, since 1999, there has been a whole wave of old souls experiencing their own long-term crisis for the same purpose as my own. Potentially, this is also about activating the 12 strands of DNA over the course of 12 years followed by the year 2012 in which the 13th strand – ‘love’ - is activated. As with the opening of the heart itself, this is, one imagines, more involved than previous activations.

Not to sound too esoteric this early in the game but it is time for truth on all levels to be made available for those who are ready to find it. I may be upping the ante somewhat by writing this general Introduction to the trilogy which may also be taken as an informational update for the purpose of further clarification. Let us, however, regard it as a cluster of cherries on a tree to which we can always return should they not appear to have ripened for us. In other words, leave it one side for now if it seems like too big a step to make at this point. Just don’t lose it altogether! (Please…and it’s a new carpet as well!).

“Your heart centre has many chambers. Each chamber has many gifts within. Angels are directing streams of light of a quality that has not been fully present on the earth plane before to the hearts of all who are open to receive it. This light acts as a key for each chamber. These chambers are being opened in sequence. As more and more of these chambers open your heart becomes a template for what has been called the City of God.

Here are two ways in which you can assist this further opening of your heart centre:

First, welcome the light of blessings into your life. Simply you can say whenever it occurs to you, ‘I welcome the light of blessings into my life.’ Then saying ‘Thank you,’ helps too. The light of blessings will draw to you those experiences that help you most to turn the key in the lock of each chamber to reveal the treasures within. Second, practise giving unconditional love to all beings. This is what you come to Earth to learn; so even if it is sometimes difficult, it is very well worthwhile.”

- Sananda (channelled through Christopher Sell, 22 March 2012,"

“As you live deeper in the heart, the mirror gets clearer and clearer.” – Rumi.

“The practice of peace and reconciliation is one of the most vital and artistic of human actions.” – Thich Nhat Hanh.

These three books are a bit bloggy. They are about conflict and suffering and some people like to say these subjects have been overcooked. I disagree, however. I'd say they're about the most important subjects in existence. These are essentially books of philosophy, offering insights both my own and those of others, and also connecting human crises in the modern world with the spiritual Ascension process which is, unfortunately, still beyond reach for our culture of rational materialism as yet. They do, however, focus quite heavily on racial conflicts and other observations in ghettoland! Other controversial elements (for example, aliens, UFOs, Illuminati - nothing George Orwell wouldn't have encountered and written about if he were alive today!) only appear in the odd paragraph here and there. So, nothing really. Like a food packet when it warns, 'May contain trace of nuts.' As for the nutters, well, yes, I've known quite a few here, Asian, white, black…they’re all in there! I don't think publishers want to touch that. Truths hiding under the rug of failed multiculturalism are kept there - although, there is no right-wing premise for writing such books and certainly no racist agenda. The treasures and trials contained in this book are an offering of experience and contemplation. Anything I write specifically about the Global Elite or Ascension will appear in the form of articles on my site because it is just background info., etc. Not something I really write about in my books.

This is really all about learning to stop running away from pain and suffering all the time which only makes matters worse because one is identifying with fear and illusion, giving energy and life to them. And they chase you! The only ‘solution,’ really, is to raise one’s vibration in order to be on top of the situation energetically, particularly as the frequencies on Earth continue to increase.

“When we are no longer able to change a situation - we are challenged to change ourselves.” - Viktor Frankl.

Danse Macabre (the Dance of Death)

Book 1: I discover and explore the Buddhist idea that what happens in life is an illusion and we can free ourselves from suffering by choosing not to react to or be affected by it.

Book 2: Includes contemplations on accepting and taking responsibility for the circumstances in one’s life.

Book 3: Includes my discoveries as I learn about the Ascension path, view my circumstances from a new perspective and act accordingly.

In the Conclusion to Book 1, I recall ‘M,’ a serene and blissful extraterrestrial being of Light whose energy is refined and purely spiritual and whose countenance is gentle, intelligent and loving. I reflect on those encounters as seeds for an ideal of potentially expressing and embodying unconditional love myself.

In the Conclusion to Book 2, I introduce my encounters with St Germain, an embodiment of unconditional love, as an Ascended Master.

In the Conclusion to Book 3, I contemplate the journey towards being a full embodiment of unconditional love fully myself.

We chose to go through intensely challenging karmic ordeals in order to invoke and release negative emotions from other lifetimes. That IS the ascension process; it’s about self-healing. We are going through this now as the Light increases on Earth. It's also what Bashar calls the Rubber Band Theory: the darker our experience is the more fully we will awaken and embrace the joy of being in the Light in contrast. Earth has been travelling through a region of space inhabited by dark forces but it coming out of that now. We have been asleep, having nightmares! But, as we prepare to move on, we may experience more darkness in order to finally let go of it and surrender to the Light.

Book 3: St. Germain said that I am relating my experience, my journey, like a travel writer. I have been through this shift so my experiences will help to support other people as they also go through the same thing.

“I have learned something in the length of time that I have been here. This is temporary. Everything changes, whether you want it to or not. What you feel now will eventually fade and you will cease to remember it, until you need the information that you learned from it to survive, then it will be there for you.” - Amy A. Bartol (Indebted).

 "Those who understand applying the Knowledge of the 'I AM' need never, never be beset by inharmony or disturbance in their homes, worlds or activities; for it is only by a lack of acknowledgement and acceptance of the Full Power of this Mighty Presence that individuals allow human concepts and creations to disturb them.
The student should constantly look within his human self and see what habits or creations that need to be plucked out and disposed of; for only by refusing to any longer allow habits of judging, condemning and criticizing to exist can he be free. The true activity of the students is only to perfect his own world, and he cannot do it as long as he sees imperfection in the world of another of God's children."

~ Saint Germain, The 'I AM' Discourses.

“The wisdom that you have gained as a result of your fate up until this point are key elements that shall guide you through your future. Therefore wise up everyone and use your wisdom instead of banging your head against the same brick wall, which shows you the same dysfunctional picture of your past. If you are going to insist on investing energy in the old paradigm ,well then, all I can say to you is expect what you have had in the past. However, expecting the unexpected is the best way to move into your future now, and that which makes logical sense will make no sense in your future, for the logical mind is based upon the patternings of society’s projections and all of that which has been imprisoned within the cells of your body…The process of rearrangement requires that you make choices in the moment commanding different outcomes, not necessarily predicting the outcome but expecting something different. This is the greatest challenge now for humanity.” - Master Kuthumi (channelled through Michelle Eloff, ‘9:9:9 The Fluid Love, Fluid Universe Activation & Air Gates 23-29,’ 9 September 2009,

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