Wednesday, 29 April 2015

Love is VAST

By Saul

Channelled through John Smallman, 27 April 2015

All of God’s divine creation, all sentient beings, even those who appear to be utterly unaware of their inherent divine nature, are assisting humanity at this point in its spiritual awakening.  All are One.  There is no separation, there is only an illusion of separation, and therefore throughout creation all sentient life is involved and taking part in the grand awakening process.  You are not, and never have been alone or abandoned, you are just experiencing a dream that seems very real.  But of course, as you all know, dreams are unreal, and at the center of your beingness, where your true nature is always aflame in the brilliant Light of God’s Love for you, you do know this.  When you awaken from the dream into Reality all that has seemingly hurt you or caused you suffering will be gone without a trace, there will be nothing in the way of painful memories to disturb the infinite joy of being consciously in the Presence of God, our divine Source.

I cannot remind you often enough that all are One.  Within the illusion, which you built so cleverly, that does not seem to be the case.  Your physicists have realized that everything is connected, that everything affects everything else, but this fact does not appear to align with your normal day to day lives, and so it is disregarded.  It seems that you are separate individuals, and if you do something successfully to gain an advantage over someone else, you win and they lose.  Because this is how you experience your lives many do engage in deceit in small ways from time to time, believing that it serves their egoic personal agendas, and then apparently gaining their well-deserved rewards for that self-centered and competitive behavior.

In the very short term it does seem that those who deceive and manipulate others win.  However, life in the illusion is very short term, it is but a short dream from which you will awaken either at the momentof your human death into an awareness of the way you have lived your lives, and into an awareness that there is only Love, or at the rapidly approaching grand awakening into Love Itself.  The former situation, which you have all undergone countless times, can be quite shocking for those who have ignored Love as they bought into the apparent reality of the illusion and used their skills and abilities for personal gain.

In truth there is no such thing as personal gain – everyone gains, or no one gains – as your eons of conflict show you so very clearly.  And when realization of unloving lives lived egoically dawns, those unfortunate ones who chose those kinds of paths generally choose to return to the illusion as quickly as possible in order to make amends by living in rather more straitened circumstances than in their previous incarnations.  You call that karma, but in fact it is just a natural choice to undo unloving behavior and release the aspects of themselves that blocked out Love, and seemingly achieved the impossible by temporarily separating them from the Source.  Karma can be released without reincarnating, but most choose the path of reincarnation so that they can give love back by being in service to others.

All are on Earth to evolve spiritually, this has always been the case, and that is done by assisting in humanity’s awakening process.  However, many forget their purpose as the illusion envelops them and they undergo and deliver abuse in many forms.  As a result they harden their hearts in desperate attempts to survive and, with good fortune, prosper in this unloving world.  But the intent to prosper frequently leads people into deceit, betrayal, and conflict, leading to further karma.

Karma is really only a person’s own choice to make amends, a choice made on entering the spiritual or non-physical realms after bodily death, when the unloving thoughts, intents, words, and deeds of the life just past flow into their awareness as they remove their barriers to that awareness.  It can be a very painful and shocking realization.

On Earth at this moment many are experiencing very powerful emotional realizations, not specifically related to any particular past Earth life, arising into their conscious awareness and causing them intense suffering.  This is as a result of the enormous karmic release that so many have chosen to undergo in this lifetime to be ready for the grand awakening which is approaching very rapidly indeed.  You no longer have the opportunity for thousands of lifetimes in which to work it off gradually.  This is one of the reason that Earth’s population has increased so greatly in the last few decades, rather like an over-inflated balloon that is getting ready to burst.

Humanity’s awakening truly is imminent, and to awaken into Reality or, if you will, to ascend, all negative karma has to be dissolved.  In Reality only Love is present.  Love is VAST, and humanity’s negative karma is actually very small, it is part of the illusion, which is tiny in comparison to Heaven; like just a single grain of sand in an infinite ocean of extremely potent solvent.  Nevertheless, it has to be released, and there are many present on Earth at this time who have volunteered to take on and release the karma that others have incurred so thatall may awaken together in a timely fashion.

If you are experiencing great and very painful emotional upheavals you may well be one of the team of willing volunteers who incarnated purely to do this.  If you are one of these brave and loving souls, know that you are most highly honored for taking on this heavy duty so that all can awaken as divinely planned.

Free will is a God-given gift that will never be overridden, so if some choose not to awaken and instead remain immersed in the illusion, that choice will be honored.  Eventually those who make that choice will change their minds, but until they do their choice to remain unawakened will be allowed, and it will not be allowed to interfere with or prevent the grand awakening of everyone else.

If it is your intent to take part in this grand awakening, and there truly are very, very few who have already chosen or will yet choose not to partake, then rest assured, you will awaken, because it is your intent.  Do not be anxious or worried.  You are infinitely loved by God, and nothing that you can do will ever alter that fact.  It is God’s Will that you awaken, and because you intend to awaken then you will.  Any self-doubt or thoughts of unworthiness on your part can be safely dismissed because God does not judge or condemn, He only loves, and in so doing welcomes all into the loving embrace that is Reality, Heaven.  And that loving embrace is your final and utterly joy-filled goal, drawing you steadily onwards towards the Home you have never left.

With so very much love, Saul.

Thursday, 23 April 2015

Monstaville Book III. Chapter 8


Prayer for Peace

Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace.
Where there is hatred, let me sow love;
Where there is injury, pardon;
Where there is doubt, faith;
Where there is despair, hope;
Where there is darkness, light;
And where there is sadness, joy;

O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek
To be consoled as to console;
To be understood as to understand;
To be loved as to love.

For it is in giving that we receive;
It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;
And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.

- St. Francis of Assisi.

St Francis with the wolf that was terrorising a village

The Shining Brother. Recording the spirit return of St. Francis of Assisi and its sequel Francis Speaks Again by Laurence Temple (Compiled by Greta Freund and edited by Paul Beard, Psychic Press, London, U.K., 1941/1970).

The Shining Brother is my favourite book of all time. Although I have lost much of the purity and innocence of my twenties, I have gained more strength and wisdom through my subsequent trials. I believe I bought this book from a Spiritualist Church when they added new stock to their library (a bookcase in the corner). The book is by Laurence Temple (an architect at the time) to whom countless messages were given by St. Francis through mediums during the 1930s and 40s (sometimes in trance sittings). St. Francis refers to himself by his Italian name, Francesco, and he says that Laurence was ‘Brother Leo’ when they were together in Assisi (and Laurence is a portion of his Higher Self, whose name is Lorenzo). He describes himself as Laurence’s spiritual Father. I have read that when a person surrenders to a great soul and becomes devoted to such a Master Soul he or she is kind of adopted like a child and their spiritual growth can be quickened under that being’s guidance. A deep and enduring spiritual bond is forged. St. Francis mentions that he was James in the days of Jerusalem and that it was with St. Patrick in Glastonbury in another incarnation prior to that one that he was reborn spiritually and placed his feet firmly on the spiritual path.

I’m not so sure that James was the actual blood brother of Jeshua ben Joseph (or ‘ben David’). I suspect that the reference relates to his own rebirth in the Christ energy (through which we become one with the Light and the Word) in that incarnation. In his book, James, the Brother of Jesus: the key to unlocking the Secrets of Early Christianity and the Dead Sea Scrolls, Robert Eisenman “propounds that James, not Peter, was the real successor to the movement we now call ‘Christianity.’ James, he says, was ‘a leader of Christianity of his day and the popular Jewish leader of his time, whose death triggered the uprising against Rome - a fact that creative rewriting of early Church documents has obscured.’” (The Watkins Review, Issue 11, Summer 2005, p.31). Hence, James’ subsequent incarnation in Italy to restore a level of simplicity, innocence and purity in the most humble and loving way possible so as not to provoke but create something of lasting value for those in need to draw upon. I do not think he set out to reform the Patriarchal Church (which was, and still is, beyond repair). Rather, he seems to have been determined to establish his own monastic dimension - the Brotherhood of Love that “grew out of the flowers and birds” (Shining Brother, p.149) - within it, to create a parallel division in which his own vision could be preserved. In this endeavour, he was undoubtedly successful, and thus, his great mission has continued ‘beyond the grave.’ It has moved beyond the Franciscan Order to embrace a wider group of souls as, says St. Francis, the Holy ones have gathered together to pour a ‘great flood of illumination’ upon the earth. (ibid. p.121). Indeed, the old Order “became just another order; good enough and sensible, but not that band of free and flaming Troubadours of God for which Francis had striven,” says Laurence. (ibid. p.155).

The great Indian Master Meher Baba devoted his life to serving the ‘masts,’ of ‘God-mad’ (those who had lived for the spiritual life but lost touch with physical reality). He travelled to Assisi in Italy to spend some time in the cave where St. Francis often devoted the days and nights to meditation and contemplation to be closer to God. In the scripts, Francesco refers to these experiences as “‘sharing the life of the angels.’” (ibid. p.151). Meher Baba and St. Francis are both revered by artists, incidentally.

In those days, I was searching and I was open to all sources of divine wisdom. I no longer see much value in Christianity but, back then, I studied the writings of Christian mystics as well as many other mystical teachings from around the world. I do understand, however, that there is a full range of understanding and expression in all religions. Although the Church, as a political tool, has done its utmost to vanquish Truth, a ‘Stairway to Heaven’ lingers on, luminous yet hidden from view, a golden staircase beyond the veil of ignorance that prevails in the outward form of orthodoxy. Ever the student, I did not have the heart, the strength, courage and will, or the faith and purpose, for spiritual leadership that was, it appears, hoped for me. ‘Many are called, but few are chosen.’

Each and every word uttered by ‘Francesco’ in these readings is charged with unparalleled love and exquisite beauty. It is ‘pure poetry’ and quenches the soul’s thirst if one has sufficient depth of feeling. I was certainly moved by them anyway, filled with love and solace and sometimes with tears in my eyes. I read a comprehensive book on the life and teachings of St. Francis - the Spiritual Master - during a five-day fast. Some friends were taking their barge to a new mooring out in the country and had to abandon the journey before arriving at their destination since they had to be back at work on the Monday. I found myself in the middle of nowhere, in the most beautiful location, alone with the book I had brought with me to read. I spent my time meditating, walking and reading. I had this light purple top at the time which, with its hood, may even have made me look like some kind of monk! During one of my walks along the canal I sang in French but had not learned or known any of the words I was singing! I felt light, elated and at peace for the most part. One day, I took the little rowing boat off one a little adventure and had not realised that rowing with the wind was going to make my journey back impossible! I was quite weak’ physically by then but had to slowly make my way all the way back to the barge by pulling on clumps of reeds at the water’s edge.

I felt compelled to commune with this bright Light that was and is St. Francis on several occasions. I should point out that I have since communed with the Hindu god Ganesha during meditation on many occasions. It is said that Lord Ganesha is a kind of saviour during the Kali Yuga Age in that everyone is welcome to draw on his energy as a source of strength to assist in the battles in one’s life and to ‘remove obstacles,’ particularly those which exist between us and our divine selves. In other words, this energy helps to counteract the conditions and effects of density during this age. I mentioned these intimate and empowering meditations to a Hindu once and he stared at me blankly before talking about the statues of the elephant god that can be found all around India. When he grew anxious at my exuberance, I realised that we were talking about something completely different. For him the emphasis was on the icons themselves. I visualise Ganesha’s portrait and that creates a bridge and attracts the deity. The energy is very powerful but I have never really known if it was direct communion with a divine entity or with the imprint of it. For, it is said that all thought and energy remains in the atmosphere and that, consequently, it is possible to tap into the vibration of a Master or ‘god’ who once lived on Earth at any time during the past. If I have the cat on my lap he will, after a gentle pause, jump down if I connect with St. Francis. This happened more immediately and dramatically when I was visited by the mighty ‘Suicide Angel.’ If I attempt to commune with the Ganesha divinity and the cat is on my lap, the energy will not come to me.

When I used to commune regularly with St. Francis, I did so with single-minded passion and intensity coupled with all the humility I could muster, as an offering to honour that which this great being had himself exhibited. My call - my love - was answered on most of these occasions and I felt myself bathed in such radiant love and tenderness that soothed me to my very core and carried me away in the most beautiful feelings I have ever experienced. This sublime divinity is perfectly described in the book: “Francesco’s radiance; lingering, all-pervading sweetness.” (p.267). Once, I just cried for the sheer beauty of that energy which released me from all my unconscious pain for a while. I simply remained there for as long as I could. I would also visualise little blue flowers (bluebells) and lay them at his feet in a gesture of love, for I knew that ‘little things’ were dear to him.

“People don’t cry only when they are said or hurt. They cry when something beautiful happens such as when they are letting go of their guard, their defences, or tapping into a place deep inside themselves.” – Unkown.

And, if anyone thinks this is all mad, I’ll shoot ‘em! Haha. Yes, well, I am not quite the sweet soul I once was. I did not know then that I am a comparatively powerful old soul and that I would regain my power and be forced to start all over again and learn to integrate it harmoniously and responsibly through the development of strength and wisdom. Certainly, I know that innocence is bliss and that is what I finally lost. I tried, once or twice, to connect with St. Francis during the early days in this flat but received no response and I knew it meant that I had changed and had lost the plot spiritually. I had entered a long, dark tunnel years before but the light was still shining visibly behind me. Now, I was right in the middle, being tested and strengthened without mercy. My inner demons were being summoned to the surface. Anger and grief bested me so many times during this endurance test. Self-control cannot be attained as long as such psychological impurities are left to lurk within oneself. They must be fought on the battlefield of conscious identity. Light and dark must clash swords if ever the hidden obstacles to soul growth are to be overcome. While writing this chapter, however, I did indeed share the saint Grace during meditation and assure you that I intend to attune to his vibration on occasion in future. Surely anyone can do this and there are many other ‘deities’ with whom one can connect in this way. I have a connection to the Egyptian Goddess Isis as well, but I have never felt her draw close and share her vibration with me when I have attuned myself to her. We now hear of the Ascended Masters (which appears to be a rebranding of the Great White Brotherhood to emphasise the opportunity now at hand for human beings collectively) who have returned to assist in the Earth/humanity’s Ascension process: Sananda (Jesus), Mother Mary, Mary Magdalen, Kuan Yin, Lord Kuthumi, Lord Melchezedek, Lord Maitreya and so forth [Retrospective note: And Beloved St. Germain whom I now ‘commune’ with every day – and especially since learning that he has the gift of being able to be in several places at the same time]. According to a transmission through Natalie Glasson (8 April 2009), we can also commune (merge) with the angels, including the new trinity of Ascension angels Archangel Chamuel, Zadkiel and Raziel who can be called upon to cleanse and heal us, to prepare us for integration with the angelic ascension light deep within our being and share it with those in need on the Earth. [Retrospective note: I now also commune regularly with Lord Metatron and Mother Sekhmet].

“It is not ‘wrong’ to be a doubting Thomas. In fact, it means that you do ask. The doubting Thomas of biblical record was a very enlightened soul, who did double ask and inquire. This is a good thing and something all should do...I would say to the one who is the doubting Thomas, ask for my energy to come around you. Ask for my wings to surround you, beloved, and you will then understand who and what I am. Namaste, Sananda Immanuel Esu Kumara, Planetary Prince of Urantia [Earth].” - (through Candace Frieze, 9 October 2006,

I have not read The Shining Brother for some years but, since it has been such a comfort to me at certain times in the past, it is only fair that I pass some of this majestic beauty on to those who seek respite and understanding in these books of my own which began as a few private thoughts scribbled in a notebook. The following excerpts from the St. Francis scripts (unless stated otherwise) are, in fact, taken from another notebook, one of two that I filled with helpful quotations in 1991 in case I should ever find myself owning nothing but the contents of a single bag. I left them with my father when I traveller to India and, at the time, I wondered if I would become a permanent wanderer since this desire was strong in me at the time. I feel fortunate to have been given a taste of such a life. There is, indeed, for me, no greater wealth than such liberation. Perhaps, in a different age, that path might have been open to me.

p.107. “‘My son, the final struggle is a bitter one and pierceth to the bones and marrow; for all that a man is must be taken from him before he can put on the garment of the Holy ones and wait upon his Lord.’”

p.110-111.“‘Have faith and fear not, for short and bitter are the days of earth...The darkness is the gift of love as truly as the light.’”

p.111. “‘My son ye have suffered much, for thy way hath been hard for ye, and veils of darkness have enwrapped thy soul. Ye have lost much which was precious unto ye, and that which ye have gained is not yet apparent.’”

p.112-113. “‘Ye shall look back and understand that thine agony hath brought ye to a height that ye could attain in no other way, and thy tears shall be as sacred drops which sanctified and cleansed thine inward parts.
                ‘My son, we, thy Protectors and Teachers, see life not as dost thou, for to us naught is of value save the growth of the soul, the gradual deliverance from the illusions of earth. And to us it is a time of rejoicing when the test can at last be given and the beloved one raised a step nearer the abode of the Blessed.
                ‘Though we grieve with the suffering one, yet our vision embraceth that which is and that which is to be; and, in the gladness of the coming days, the dark night seemeth but a shadow through which we guide our well-beloved children. Therefore, my son, gaze ye ever on thy goal, and know that thy life on earth is given ye that ye may gather strength. For the Lord needeth those that are mighty men of valour, whose hearts quail not during the tumult, who have overcome the flesh and the desires thereof, and whose armour hath been forged and perfected by fire and by labour. For by endurance shall ye triumph, and the steadfast man shall climb to the stars.
                ‘Be assured that I am with ye and as thy feet crossed the deep river, my hand upheld ye. My love hath been thy shield and the Powers of Darkness shall not prevail, for ye are sealed unto the Lord, and thy work is before ye.’”

p.118. “‘My son, regret nothing in the past, all experiences have been necessary for thy growth; they are outgrown. But now that ye have come to the time of flowering see that ye bear thy blossoms in full and perfect beauty, letting no strain of earth pollute them or canker touch their heart, but offering the fragrance of thy being to the Pure Heavens to which ye aspire.’”

p.174. “Thy power dwelleth in thy faith, and as ye believe so shall it be unto ye. Therefore, my beloved son, look not on thy weakness, for thy Father knoweth thy nature and he will not expose ye to the cruel thorns nor to the jagged rocks until he hath covered ye with his vestments and shod thy feet with strength.
                ‘My son, my blessing is upon ye and ye shall share my vision and my joy: and thy Father will bear thy sorrows and comfort ye in thy distresses.’”

p.183. “‘For to the Pure of Heart will the Light come when darkness enshroudeth the outer world.
                ‘...for ye have received thy Baptism and have passed through the Valley of Humiliation thereby ascending to a closer kinship with thy Father and receiving the recognition of thine ageless companions.’”

p.275. “‘Only if man lose his faith in the unseen can he be defeated. It is for this purpose that we have apparelled ourselves in the lovely robes of earth, laying aside our gleaming garments and attuning our souls to the slow beats of your hearts, the dull measure of your minds, that we may instil some fragments of that heavenly love which is the food of the spirit and the wine of life.
                ‘The strength of the divine world shall be felt throbbing through the dun house of clay. Man shall no longer think of God as remote and inaccessible, but he shall be aware of the wonder and mystery of the presence of the Holy One, and he shall say in his joy:
                ‘’God is with us; God hath made His habitation with man and built His tabernacle upon earth!’‘”

p.286-287. “‘It has been necessary for you to experience the utter depths of misery and abasement that you may know the ecstasy of joy that balances your pain.
                ‘When you understand the laws of the Almighty, all anger, all disappointment, all evil, however great, are found to bring their compensating reaction, to have their place in the fashioning of the human soul.
                ‘So, my brother, read not the outward signs of woe, but look within and ask for wisdom to interpret the tribulations of the earth in terms of eternity. And your soul shall be filled with hope, for our God doth not stand without the world, but moulds the spirit of man to even finer issues as the soul responds more eagerly both to that which is evil and to that which is good.’” (From one of the four brothers, possibly Masseo).

“The energies of the old are frightened now. They know at some level that they are leaving. In this way, they are becoming ever more difficult to interact with, as fighting, fear, nastiness and an extreme effort to maintain some kind of control has the lower vibrating energies by the coattails.” – Karen Bishop (‘Time to Jump In...the Waiting is Over,’ 6 October 2008,

“Come, faithful ones. Come those who have delayed! Do not be afraid to smell the sweet perfume of eternity. In this very moment are you made clean and pure, brought forth in the flowering beauty of God’s creation. Brush the sleep from your mind and drop the dust-encrusted yesteryear from the garment of your soul. Gleam with me awhile in the quiet moments of our inner unification. Are your present activities so important that you would not trade them for the everlasting peace that love brings?
                Forgiveness is offered you again, beloveds, ere the Creator’s call takes us one step closer to home. Do not linger in your earthly toys a moment longer but raise your consciousness in meditation to the infusing movement of love energy which insists firmly and eternally upon peace within, and peace without. Does not the scent of truth fill your being? Then breathe with God, with me and all who divinely love you.”
                - Jeshua (‘The Christ,’ channelled through Virginia Essene, New Teachings For An Awakening Humanity, Spiritual Education Endeavours Publishing Company, Santa Clara, CA, U.S., 1986, updated 1994, p.83-84).

Retrospective inserts.

In an email received in December 2009, a friend asked me what I do during meditation. I thought I would include my reply here as a kind of update: ‘Oh when I meditate I do some energy work on myself and the planet, and for people I know who need healing, and I tune into a higher being to merge with me, or 'overlight' me. I originally learned to do this years ago courtesy of St. Francis of Assisi (after reading his beautiful channelled book from the 1940s I wondered if I might be able to connect with him during meditation and lo and behold! there he was in all his beauty and splendour...and love like I'd never known)! Then I did this with Ganesha for a few years, until this year in fact, who is said to be the antidote to the Kali Yuga (I consider him my best friend because he's always there for me!). And also with an angel for a while. When I need or want to treat myself or greater spiritual power is required to uplift me or give me confidence I attune to Mother Sekhmet (who lived, and ruled, for thousands of years during the Golden Age in Egypt, at the same time as Atlantis): her energy is delightfully powerful but feminine. Communion with Ganesha and Sekhmet is a warrior’s energy feast! On most occasions this year I have meditated with St. Germain and he has helped me in a more tangible and personal way for which I am very grateful. And recently I have also had the honour of being visited by the Goddess a couple of times. In fact, the first time was so powerful it affected me for a whole week! Occasionally, I also tune into Metatron, and I do the Ascension Angels meditation once a month or something (it used to be every Sunday). But this doesn't appear to be readily accessible for me, yet anyway. Plus, of course, there are various meditations one finds here and there and I try some of these sometimes. Nothing too complex though. I was using an alchemical technique recommended by the Barefoot Doctor for a few years as well and I experimented with an Egyptian one described by Tom Kenyon briefly. After that, I practiced a meditation based on bringing a golden ball of light down into each chakra but then replaced that with St. Germain's suggestions, and others. So I have my own little 'medley' as-it-were! I also include certain decrees and affirmations as and when I feel like it.

“Experience is not, however, the sole way to expand consciousness. For each moment spent with God or one of his cosmic band serves to exalt and broaden individual consciousness, conveying illumination on the instant – in the twinkling of an eye!” - St. Germain (recorded by Mark L. Prophet and Elizabeth Clare Prophet, Saint Germain on Alchemy. Formulas for Self-transformation, Summit Publications, Inc., MT., U.S., 1985 and 1993, p.41-42).

"The same amount of time that it takes to walk into a coffee shop, order, receive, drink and walk out the door...take THAT amount of time each day, and your worries will fall. Give God a face, whatever you like, God cares not. Call it Goddess, call it God - does not matter. It is the intention. Go to God and say, ‘Listen here, I have heard that you’re here to help me, yet my life experience at certain times does not show that. Prove it to me. Show me. Breathe through me. Talk through me. Show me beautiful thoughts. Work through me. Express through me. For every time I went in front of what they call Masters, they looked quite happy!’” – St. Germain (channelled through Ashamarae McNamara,

I recommend communing with the Mother Goddess. I had planned to perform a ceremony on the evening of the Taurus Full Moon on 1 November 2009 but it was too late by the time I got round to it. Instead, I was privileged to be granted communion with Isis which I requested in response to her invitation in a channelled transmission from a couple of years earlier. It was 11.30 p.m. and I was very tired and yet Isis still managed to ‘merge’ with me (no one else, except Ganesha, seems willing or able to enter my aura so intimately so late in the day). Isis can do anything it appears. Ashamarae, who channels St. Germain, reports that she cooled an exceptionally hot room for them while they received a powerful solar activation from Her in Egypt. Consequently, I confided much from my heart because I felt her powerful presence and could also tangibly feel Her listening to me in a very motherly way that felt sweet and kind. Indeed, I have never felt so listened to in all my life. I was very touched by the experience. I also asked for Her miraculous intervention in my life [I believe it was principally She who was responsible for curing my attention deficiency]. Actually, I found that communion so powerful that it affected me for a whole week afterwards! It feels like a reunion.

"My children, I am your Universe Mother. I have been known throughout the ages by many names by the children of this world through their various religious traditions and practices. Yet through all of this I would be known as the great Unifier and Harmoniser of humanity. In me lies a power presence that you can come and experience to make you more loving and tolerant of your brothers and sisters who differ from you. The diversity of this world's cultures has been created to stimulate personal relationships and to expand your awareness into the vastness and variety of creation. You were not created to be all alike in all aspects.
Now that your planet's intra‑communications methods are weaving you closer in contact, allow yourselves to be woven closer together in your hearts. You all share the same basic endowments of humanity and the desires of your hearts are similar notwithstanding the ways you may express them through the various languages and cultures. You are designed to evolve into peaceful, tolerant, patient, compassionate, liberated sons and daughters of a high destiny. It is time to recognise your basic humanity that all may grow and truly be unified as one in the Spirit.
Come to me as your Mother Unifier and Harmoniser and allow me to weave you in that language of love that brings you closer to loving your brothers and sisters in ONENESS. Drink deeply of this word, my beloveds, and ask me to grow you in your ability to think, feel and act with the love that binds all things together in creation and beauty."
- Our Divine Mother (Centre for Christ Consciousness, 25 October 2009,

“I use humour to mask the fact that I want to fall off the face of the earth.” – Allison (aged 16).

“A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice. ‘Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.’ The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished.
He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted: ‘Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step a car will run over you and you will die.’ The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him.
‘Where are you?’ the man asked. ‘Who are you?’
‘I am your guardian angel,’ the voice answered.
‘Oh yeah?’ the man asked. ‘And where the hell were you when I got married?’”
– Unknown.

Sunday, 19 April 2015

Aligning Judgement 1

Message from P'taah

Channelled through Jani King, April 2015

(first half of message)

'Self-portrait' by Fallen Angelus

Q: P'taah, you talked last month about Judgement. You said that what we judge outside is a reflection of what is occurring inside and that the universe will support the energy we are putting forth. Will we will learn that as a process?

P'taah: Indeed, although we prefer not to call it 'process' because that is much about what you do when you are processing your issues and what you term 'going to your stuff', mmm? We would say rather to be in allowance and to bless the judgement and then simply to be still and go to the feeling. Because underneath that negative judgement there will be a fear or that way of looking at who you are which creates the perception of your exterior reality.

Q: What if you can't seem to get in touch with what that fear is?

P'taah: You know, much of the time it is simply to ask the right questions of yourself. The easiest way is to say, "What does it feel like?" And then you say, "It feels like this." "Well, what does that look like?" to come to your bottom line. You understand? 

Q: Mmhmm.

P'taah: Well, of course you know, my beloved, that the bottom line issues are always exactly the same. And that is that you are simply not enough and that you do not live in a safe universe. So you can get involved with the story, but truly it is just a little feeling. 

But it is to pay attention, whether it is judgement or anything else in your life that is not representing the highest - your highest - ideal of who you are. To pay attention to 'how does it feel?' and to deal with that in the moment. But judgement, indeed, is a grand and wondrous tool for you!

Q: Can you expand a little bit on the embracement and how to do that?

P'taah: All right. To align the judgement really is simply to bless it. To give thanks for it as a tool. You do not have to get involved with a grand ritual. It is simply to say, "From the God-Goddess of my being I give thanks, indeed, for this wondrous opportunity." And then to recognize this tool termed judgement. And that includes the judgement of yourself, the judgement of a situation, the judgement of people out there with whom you have co-created an event! You see? And as soon as you are in that allowance by giving forth the thanks and blessings, the judgement is no longer. 

And you recall that we have talked to you about your pain and anguish. What is pain? Pain is resistance to the feeling created by a judgement. If you have no judgement about a situation, it does not create pain within your breast, mmm? You would be totally detached from it.

And then you look at your life. You see how you have in your life created and recreated and recreated and recreated situations which have brought forth pain and anguish. 

Look how you have run in judgement and have been running since you were tiny children about what you think is the meaning of life. 'Love equals pain,’ is one of those things you carry. That you are not enough, because if you were enough, you would not create these painful and anguishing situations. You would not be betrayed and abandoned or feel that you are not worthy of wealth and abundance. You would not know lack in any fashion. You see? 

And so all of these judgements are really created by these ideas and fears, which is the way you view yourself and your world. And thusly you create and recreate these experiences. 


Monday, 13 April 2015

Monstaville Book III. Chapter 7


“Let us pray for a mind so poised and balanced that we give poise and strength to others.”
- White Eagle.

Regarding the abusers of power in this world, the logical solution is to use every force available to obliterate them, but that’s my male side talking, my will and my head! The love and wisdom that are felt in the feminine heart whisper that the oneness of life is sacred because we all belong to one Godhead; we are all One. When we feel more, we love more. I don’t mean emotional responses in the belly that result from superficial needs and dependency, but - you know? - this the still waters running deep, the wisdom of the heart. It looks like a dark abyss from afar, when centred in one’s own individual will and identity has a human being, as a man. Yet, it is no different from a clear, tranquil, shimmering lake which, to me, is about the most beautiful thing that exists in nature.

At first, you wince as, bit by bit, your legs experience the freezing temperature and your bollocks bark and growl in anger and fear, fight or flight (‘You bastard, what do you think you’re doing?...No, no way, stop you crazy son-of-a-bitch! Let’s get out of here...nooo...!). Yet, it is not long before your body grows accustomed to the temperature and the water feels comfortable and relaxing. Even your bollocks - if they could talk - take it all back: ‘This is Heaven! We really must do this more often!’ Boom boom! (No idea why I seem to think that if testicles could talk they could have a voice like Basil Brush).

So, you swim, or play, float, make-love, whatever, and it all feels beautiful and makes you smile. You feel at peace. The sun is shining overhead and your body feels just right. Stillness and movement flow together naturally. This is the effect that the feminine - infinite consciousness - should have on us. It is both something that exists, with its own properties, and what we make it. We behave differently on land, we men in particular, with our conscious but limited egos. In the lake, there is only so much action you can engage in. The only thing to do is feel...relax. It is a peaceful place where will and identity can exist but not in isolation and where they are less likely to dominate, to exclude consciousness itself from the arena of human experience. For, it is the experience (illusion) of physical separateness that concentrates man’s energy and creates a false identity and that wants what it wants NOW and is blind to the needs and feelings of others.

The inner silence defies the head, like the Oracle defies the Architect in The Matrix trilogy. The old order is mechanical, limited, fixed. Anything beyond its reasoned constructs and the principles which comprise its identity are unacceptable. They are a threat that must be dealt with not accommodated. Zion must be annihilated. It’s logical! Well, I’m not saying that, but I am saying that the worst elements in humanity, the ones who exist to cause chaos...You know, I don’t know what to do about them! That’s why we have prisons. Society doesn’t know what to do with them either. 

Raw power, launched in anger because things aren’t the way we want, or expect, them to be serves no one, least of all ourselves. Reason and compassion, an open mind and an open heart, must be the wings with which the mind is elevated and flies alongside the angels. As long as the separate ego stands in our way, eclipsing the heart, obstructing the flow of love, cutting us off from the whole, the voice of ‘reason’ will remain confined to the logic that is relevant only within a certain framework. The will is then decisive but wisdom is left far behind. Feeling: feeling should permeate every moment of our lives just as we ought to be conscious of what we feel and who we are (‘You teach best what you most need to learn,’ as Richard Bach notes in Illusions).

Monsters at the gate…We men tend to identify with and centre ourselves in what comes up from within us. So if monsters come up we think we must be monsters and feel bad about ourselves or change direction either to ill-effect upon ourselves or others. The male body concentrates energy/will/power so we're gonners unless we can open our hearts and release the love of the divine within us. And that comes through wisdom and practice of course. Like a new muscle we're exercising. Man’s body has a shape that reflects his single-mindedness. His concentrated energy summons will which, of course, has its place, but the ensuing power requires a level of inner strength and self-discipline most do not develop. Years of pain and toil may lead a man to the lake of wisdom and love and then it’s time to go home. Woman’s more curvaceous body reflects her multi-dimensionality, that of consciousness itself as it flows in cycles and response; in fact, like the current of the sea, which builds up momentum and finally crashes on the shore and then withdraws to start the process all over again. Energy circulates through the feeling of wholeness but much is wasted and dissipated without a central focus, a concrete, conscious sense of identity. There can be power then only by developing one’s will (I am generalising; of course some women are more strong-willed than men but it is usually not in isolation as the male ego tends to be), or by bonding with other women.

There are two types of ego. Both are negative but, within that paradigm are the positive (active) extrovert/bully and the negative (passive) introvert/victim. They represent extremes resulting from conditioning in which people become stuck. To become more balanced, the extrovert needs to relax and open up to become more sensitive and caring while the introvert needs to draw on his or her inner power somehow and become more assertive and confident. Anaïs Nin once wrote, “Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.” Seen from the perspective of process (feminine), it is so obvious that the fixed, self-centred, competitive ego is an ignorant state to hold on to. Viewed from the perspective of purpose (masculine), it appears equally obvious that just being open to life and people, passively responding and caring for others is pointless. Human beings have at least some potential to express (so they are either winners or losers in a competitive or tyrannical male-dominated society), however limited. What else is there? When we are attuned to our feelings, we know that they flow continuously, and, in the depths of the soul, we also know that, on this level, we are all one, neither being nor becoming, just sharing the body of water in the lake, as it were. It is when the masculine and feminine, the head and heart, are balanced that we realise life is a perpetual process of becoming. But, one cannot continue to become more unless one has a conscious identity to deepen and expand. It is a great cosmic joke. We need both aspects, being and consciousness, yet, taken separately, we are doomed. Either we will be passive victims or selfish despots. Either we will be stuck in a tight, fixed, knot of egocentricity or all the strands will fall apart and leave us with nothing to show for our trials in life.

Firmness and flexibility, say the Daoists, firm in your core as an individual expression of God, with your unique vibration of consciousness, and gentle and yielding, relaxed and accommodating, towards other people and towards all conditions with which life presents you. Because that is all oneness and it is the oneness of the river that slowly shapes the rock, removing its hard edges. Gradually, the rock’s shape no longer resists the flow of water or looks out of place. The individual spark of consciousness adopts a softer shape, a kinder attitude. Its surface becomes smoother and it achieves a state of complete harmony with the incessant flow of water. It looks more comfortable and it feels at home in the river. The water could never change because it has no real substance. That which has substance must evolve until it is perfected, until it is perfectly aligned with nature. We may hate to change, to suffer and grow, but the universe, in its wisdom, has provided tools to shape us so that we may deepen our self-awareness instead of sticking out like protruding monoliths that exist for their own sake in the illusory dimension of separateness. We must remain both centred and open, know ourselves, but be prepared to change, at least in certain areas, certain blind spots which we have yet to explore and understand more consciously. We must know ourselves, not as fixed entities in a physical and material context, but as magical beings with limitless potential, endless possibilities, in fact.

"It's hard for many people to believe that there are extraordinary things inside themselves, as well as others." - Unbreakable (directed by M. Night Shyamalan, 2000).

When we feel at home in the collective universe, when we do not feel the temptation to resist anything, when we are confident in our own inner, conscious will and identity, the water passes all around us and we feel it and welcome it. It does not crash against stubborn walls of resistance or spin off at wild angles from sharp edges. The rock remains. In fact, it knows itself more deeply because it is not forever fighting against the outside world, being agitated or trying to get its own way. It does not confine its conscious awareness to its superficial, external identity alone. It does not identify with those worldly parts of itself which, however powerful and tough they may appear, represent, in fact, the transient exterior that is first in the firing line. While we have been granted free will in order to grow individually through the power of choice, we cannot stop the flow of experience which bombards those hard edges. Become more rounded we must. Hmmmmm. (My best Yoda impression).

Unfortunately, being surrounded by the water of collective consciousness in this world, we do not always receive the warm rays of the Sun. Indeed, the water is often so overcast that we would rather be more active in order to generate heat and keep ourselves warm and stimulated in a physical way than step into the cold pool of water that threatens to extinguish our joy and enthusiasm, even our will to live. Then, there are those who are addicted to stress and displays of aggression and power. And, yet, how are we ever going to create a world in which everyone is surrounded by love? Heaven on Earth can manifest only when we, as individuals, open out hearts fully and allow universal love to shine forth in all its abundant glory.

This is what I’ve learned over the past ten years, both to become and be more powerful as an individual, using the power of intention, and to understand that whatever others do is just their personal experience, just part of the collective river of life. It does not affect my core but teaches me to understand that, whatever others do is just their personal experience, just part of the collective river of life. It does not affect my core but teaches me to be more compassionate.

“Resist what resists in you. Become yourself.” - The Mahabarata.

While I have never really hated anybody, I can see how closing off my heart to certain types of people helps to sustain the illusion of separation. Internal division breeds external conflict. It might be necessary to take action and express power but, always, it should be done with love and, preferably, humour. It is important not to resist life or what it throws at us, but to surrender the ego and view things from a higher perspective as well as to find the right tools for dealing with the situation most effectively and harmoniously. As Winston Churchill said: “If you are going through hell, keep going” (or, as Robert Frost suggested, "The best way out is always through"). Pay off your karmic debts and learn the lessons they bring. It certainly looks like I am learning to love all equally.

“Look upon all difficulty as a way to exert your will-power.” - Omraam Mikhaël Aïvanhov.

Ultimately, we need to ensure that the power and will of God - the Self - is expressed, not that of the ego, the self. Why? Because the latter stunts our growth and chains us to the Wheel of Karma and therefore misery, even if we temporarily silence our fear and insecurities (in the ‘now’), and the former leads us ever onwards and upwards to greater realisations of creative power and, beyond the domain of matter, ever-increasing levels of love and happiness. Under hypnosis, I witnessed myself as a soul in my mother’s womb preparing to be born. I was honestly shocked by the feeling of peaceful, even keen, anticipation at the prospect of undergoing my imminent ordeal which would last for years and affect me for the whole of my life. It was there in front of my mind’s eye, as clear as daylight, with a kind of me-ish form, a pure image of what my soul might look like if it had form. The feeling was beautiful and unmistakably real, but it was hard to believe or accept. It was incredible, fascinating! It taught me a lot about how blind we are to what is going on beneath the surface, underneath all the conditioning accumulated through experience.

For all my incessant desire to escape from all this madness, really it is nothing more than the stirring of mud on the river bed, an opportunity to experience the latent negativity within the unconscious so that it can be cleared with conscious light. The water itself remains pure for, when the turbulence finally comes to an end and the dirt settles back again, the water is as clear and pristine as ever. It is in contrast to the disturbances of the temporal world and their effect on our personal consciousness that we reflect the Sun’s radiant majesty more richly and awaken to our original nature as the Sun, the Self, beaming brightly at the heart of universal consciousness. Thus, each time we incarnate, we gather more gold even though we may not be aware of how much we have accumulated in the spiritual bank. Then, when we depart, yet again, we get to enjoy all that Light. No wonder, then, that the soul loves coming to this chaotic world!

“Take a breath and understand the maturity that is required for the next step. You are given choices and understanding to listen and believe and be greater than you are now. Let your heart begin to open in compassion for what is to become of a world that is lost to many and found by others. Let yourself see into your eyes and know that you are coming forth as a Wayshower and one who can speak the truth and become the truth, become a planetary teacher, a teacher of Light. There are moments in each life when you are given an opportunity to make a choice. This is such a time and you have already made this choice to move into the Light, to move into the higher Light and to hear the sound of the celestial spheres, the sound of harmonics and resonance that echo throughout your mind and into the other dimensions. You are being brought into a higher place of knowing. You are seeing things and knowing things and understanding that you are much more than you ever thought you were. Many experience the psychic experiences of feeling and being in other places and other times, of knowing different people and feeling the coincidences that allow you to breathe through veil after veil after veil.” (YouTube video, September 2008: The GoldRing. Game of Enlightenment and Abundance. ‘Shining Ones of the Enlightenment’).

The Vermont Trip Red Scale Film by omnialx on Flickr

The Fire From Within by Carlos Castaneda (Simon & Schuster, New York, U.S., 1984).

     * Self-importance is our greatest enemy. Think about it - what weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellow men. Our self-importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone.
                Every effort should be made to eradicate self-importance from the lives of warriors. Without self-importance we are invulnerable.
    * I've explained to you that the new seers aim to be free. And freedom has the most devastating implications. Among them is the implication that warriors must purposely seek change. Your predilection is to live the way you do. You stimulate your reason by running through your inventory and pitting it against your friends' inventories. Those manoeuvres leave you very little time to examine yourself and your fate. You will have to give up all that.
    * Seers are divided into two categories. Those who are willing to exercise self-restraint and can channel their activities toward pragmatic goals, which would benefit other seers and man in general, and those who don't care about self-restraint or about any pragmatic goals. The latter have failed to resolve the problem of self-importance.
                Self-importance is not something simple and naive. On the one hand, it is the core of everything that is good in us, and on the other hand, the core of everything that is rotten. To get rid of the self-importance that is rotten requires a masterpiece of strategy.
    * In order to follow the path of knowledge one has to be very imaginative. In the path of knowledge nothing is as clear as we'd like it to be. Warriors fight self-importance as a matter of strategy, not principle.
                Impeccability is nothing else but the proper use of energy. My statements have no inkling of morality. I've saved energy and that makes me impeccable. To understand this, you have to save enough energy yourself.
                Warriors take strategic inventories. They list everything they do. Then they decide which of those things can be changed in order to allow themselves a respite, in terms of expending their energy.
                The strategic inventory covers only behavioural patterns that are not essential to our survival and well-being.
                In the strategic inventories of warriors, self-importance figures as the activity that consumes the greatest amount of energy, hence, their effort to eradicate it.
                One of the first concerns of warriors is to free that energy in order to face the unknown with it. The action of rechannelling that energy is impeccability.
                The most effective strategy for rechannelling that energy consists of six elements that interplay with one another. Five of them are called the attributes of warriorship: control, discipline, forbearance, timing, and will. They pertain to the world of the warrior who is fighting to lose self-importance. The sixth element, which is perhaps the most important of all, pertains to the outside world and is called the petty tyrant.
                A petty tyrant is a tormentor. Someone who either holds the power of life and death over warriors or simply annoys them to distraction.
                Petty tyrants teach us detachment. The ingredients of the new seers' strategy shows how efficient and clever is the device of using a petty tyrant. The strategy not only gets rid of self-importance; it also prepares warriors for the final realisation that impeccability is the only thing that counts in the path of knowledge.
                Usually, only four attributes are played. The fifth, will, is always saved for an ultimate confrontation, when warriors are facing the firing squad, so to speak.
                Will belongs to another sphere, the unknown. The other four belong to the known, exactly where the petty tyrants are lodged. In fact, what turns human beings into petty tyrants is precisely the obsessive manipulation of the known.
                The interplay of all the five attributes of warriorship is done only by seers who are also impeccable warriors and have mastery over will. Such an interplay is a supreme manoeuvre that cannot be performed on the daily human stage.
                Four attributes are all that is needed to deal with the worst of petty tyrants, provided, of course, that a petty tyrant has been found. The petty tyrant is the outside element, the one we cannot control and the element that is perhaps the most important of them all. The warrior who stumbles on a petty tyrant is a lucky one. You're fortunate if you come upon one in your path, because if you don't you have to go out and look for one.
                If seers can hold their own in facing petty tyrants, they can certainly face the unknown with impunity, and then they can even stand the presence of the unknowable.
                Nothing can temper the spirit of a warrior as much as the challenge of dealing with impossible people in positions of power. Only under those conditions can warriors acquire the sobriety and serenity to stand the pressure of the unknowable.
                The perfect ingredient for the making of a superb seer is a petty tyrant with unlimited prerogatives. Seers have to go to extremes to find a worthy one. Most of the time they have to be satisfied with very small fry. Then warriors develop a strategy using the four attributes of warriorship: control, discipline, forbearance, and timing.
                On the path of knowledge there are four steps. The first step is the decision to become apprentices. After the apprentices change their views about themselves and the world they take the second step and become warriors, which is to say, beings capable of the utmost discipline and control over themselves. The third step, after acquiring forbearance and timing, is to become men of knowledge. When men of knowledge learn to see they have taken the fourth step and have become seers.
                Control and discipline refer to an inner state. A warrior is self-oriented, not in a selfish way but in the sense of a total examination of the self.
                Forbearance and timing are not quite an inner state. They are in the domain of the man of knowledge.
                The idea of using a petty tyrant is not only for perfecting the warrior's spirit, but also for enjoyment and happiness. Even the worst tyrants can bring delight, provided, of course, that one is a warrior.
                The mistake average men make in confronting petty tyrants is not to have a strategy to fall back on; the fatal flaw is that average men take themselves too seriously; their actions and feelings, as well as those of the petty tyrants, are all-important. Warriors, on the other hand, not only have a well-thought-out strategy, but are free from self-importance. What restrains their self-importance is that they have understood that reality is an interpretation we make.
                Petty tyrants take themselves with deadly seriousness while warriors do not. What usually exhausts us is the wear and tear on our self-importance. Any man who has an iota of pride is ripped apart by being made to feel worthless.
                To tune the spirit when someone is trampling on you is called control. Instead of feeling sorry for himself a warrior immediately goes to work mapping the petty tyrant's strong points, his weaknesses, his quirks of behaviour.
                To gather all this information while they are beating you up is called discipline. A perfect petty tyrant has no redeeming feature.
                Forbearance is to wait patiently - no rush, no anxiety - a simple, joyful holding back of what is due.
                A warrior knows that he is waiting and what he is waiting for. Right there is the great joy of warriorship.
                Timing is the quality that governs the release of all that is held back. Control, discipline, and forbearance are like a dam behind which everything is pooled. Timing is the gate in the dam.
                Forbearance means holding back with the spirit something that the warrior knows is rightfully due. It doesn't mean that a warrior goes around plotting to do anybody mischief, or planning to settle past scores. Forbearance is something independent. As long as the warrior has control, discipline, and timing, forbearance assures giving whatever is due to whoever deserves it.
                To be defeated by a small-fry petty tyrant is not deadly, but devastating. Warriors who succumb to a small-fry petty tyrant are obliterated by their own sense of failure and unworthiness.
                Anyone who joins the petty tyrant is defeated. To act in anger, without control and discipline, to have no forbearance, is to be defeated.
                After warriors are defeated they either regroup themselves or they abandon the quest for knowledge and join the ranks of the petty tyrants for life.
    * One of the greatest forces in the lives of warriors is fear, it spurs them to learn.
    * Pull yourself together and don't fight your fear, roll with it. Be afraid without being terrified. Put all your concentration on the midpoint of your body - a true centre of energy in all of us. Fear does not exist as soon as the glow of awareness moves beyond a certain threshold inside man's cocoon.
    * Any warrior can be successful with people provided that he moves his assemblage point to a position where it is immaterial whether people like him, dislike him, or ignore him.
    * The two basic qualities of warriors are sustained effort and unbending intent.
                (Excerpts from

"The basic difference between an ordinary man and a warrior is that a warrior takes everything as a challenge, while an ordinary man takes everything as a blessing or as a curse." - don Juan (The Wheel of Time: The Shamans of Ancient Mexico, Their Thoughts About Life, Death and the Universe by Carlos Castaneda, Washington Square Press, New York, U.S., 1998).

“To be a warrior is not a simple matter of wishing to be one. It is rather an endless struggle that will go on to the very last moment of our lives. Nobody is born a warrior, in exactly the same way that nobody is born an average man. We make ourselves into one or the other.” - Carlos Castaneda (The Wheel of Time, Simon and Schuster, New York, U.S., 2001).

Baldrick (Tony Robinson): Wait my lord, do not despair. For I have a cunning plan.
Blackadder (Rowan Atkinson): Can I say I'm not optimistic Baldrick?
Baldrick: To be quite frank my lord, neither am I. My family have never been very good at plans.
Blackadder: So. With suitably low expectations, what is your plan to get us home?
- Blackadder Goes Forth (Series 4, written by Richard Curtis and Ben Elton, BBC TV, 1989).