Monstaville Book I. Chapter 11

11

"The most important thing in life is not the triumph but the struggle. The essential thing is not to have conquered but to have fought well."

- Baron Pierre De Coubertin.

Angel Cards: Forgiveness and Creativity.

You must be like the Sun, like God!

You must shine eternally and without pause or interruption. You must concern yourself with Light, God, and Being. Centre yourself in these and do not react to darkness. Darkness has the power of the unconscious, of ignorance, blindness, and hidden, undeveloped facets of your nature. Darkness will always exist but you must reach a point where you are identified with the Light, not the darkness. The darkness within yourself attracts darkness outside of yourself. But this is for your growth and transformation. You cannot easily shine light on inner darkness you cannot see, but you can shine your light in relation to darkness in the form of difficult, disruptive people and situations in the outside world where you are most conscious. Happiness is. You do not need to feel fear and anxiety. Shine your light like the Sun and let the darkness exist beyond/outside your identity - not within the aura of your light, for then you are a Sun that stops shining, for however long, and you are in danger of becoming (falling prey to) darkness. Be a Sun and grow to become a greater Sun. You are a god in the making.

Note: I was thinking earlier (probably in the shower) that I easily and naturally feel negative, especially in regard to my circumstances/body/life etc. and my depression lasts ages whereas when I’m positive I’ve usually had to force myself to do it, and it doesn’t last very long.

"If you are chronically down, it is a lifelong fight to keep from sinking." – Elizabeth Wurtzel (Prozac Nation. Young and Depressed in America: A Memoir, Riverhead Books, New York, U.S., 1995).

“That’s what you do with Depression, you mask the symptoms. The symptoms of Depression IS depression, it’s not a symptom of something else. It’s not like you go ‘oooh, I feel really sad’ and then your arse falls off. The symptoms of Depression is depression. You take away the symptoms of Depression HALLOOOOO! you’re cured! But Tom [Cruise] was like ‘no, no, no Matt. Matt, these drugs Matt, these drugs they’re just a crutch, these drugs are just a crutch!’ and I’m thinking yes?’ THEY’RE A CRUTCH! You don’t walk up to a guy with one leg and say ’hey pal, that crutch is just a crutch, THROW IT AWAY! Hop ya bastard! That crutch is masking the symptoms of your one leggedness.’” - Craig Ferguson on Tom Cruise attacking Brooke Shields for using anti-depressants to fight Post-Partum Depression.

"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you." - Lewis B. Smedes.

Interruption

“When you find yourself beginning to feel overwhelmed by negativity, you can always choose to break the pattern. Stop whatever you are doing, and for three of four minutes focus your mind on thoughts of gratitude, acceptance and peacefulness. Breathe deeply, and relax the muscles throughout your body. Reflect on how very fortunate you are to be alive and aware in this universe that's overflowing with positive possibilities. Give yourself a peaceful break. Give your spirit the opportunity of resetting to a more positive perspective, and it will. In a few short moments, you can easily and naturally break free of any negative pattern in which you may have been caught. You'll be vastly better positioned to effectively respond to whatever life sends your way. Instead of acting out of anger or frustration, fear or anxiety, you'll be able to choose your actions based on your own positive purpose. Instead of being caught up in the grip of negativity, you'll be calmly and firmly in control. When the negativity starts to get overwhelming, choose to interrupt it with a positive, peaceful break. You'll find it can make a profound and positive difference.” - Ralph Marston.

Each time you react to illusion - to events in the physical world - you add a link to the chain that binds you to it.

Whereas, each time you just exist, or express the love and serenity of the Higher Self instead of reacting, you break one of those links and grow closer to eternal freedom from the bondage of this world of illusion.

“There’s nothing like taking action as a stimulus to fixing your life. If you can’t act powerfully, don’t act. Think, wait, plan – then act powerfully. I suppose some would consider my ideas a little glib and they would offer a thousand ‘buts.’ And I would toss in a ‘but’ of my own by saying, ‘but life is only a perception, a self-realising prophecy formulated from opinion. It’s only real and traumatic if that’s what you hold to be true.’” - Stuart Wilde (Whispering Winds of Change. Perceptions of a New World, Hay House, Inc., Carlsbad, CA., U.S., 1993, p.214).

Concerning the other hateful neighbours: just be patient. Just suffer patiently. Just let the cycle of suffering follow its course to the end. Clear the karma. Do not react even in thought. Don’t give in to negative feelings. Respond with love and forbearance.

The cobra remains unaffected by the viper’s fury and fierce, aggressive behaviour. This is a good image to bear in mind. The cobra is still and poised, unaffected. It is silent. It may say positive things or sympathise with the viper’s unevolved state and suffering to come. Or it may just keep quiet - as long as it doesn’t react negatively. It does not acknowledge the viper’s actions. They are like a wasp trying to sting the sky - it cannot find an ego to latch on to. That’s what it seeks: competition, battle, to win, to prove its power. But it has no power and all its energy and thought is devoured by the cobra’s strength of presence and infinite being. The viper exhausts itself.

On this era: “We don’t look out for each other. We just put each other down.” (From a television programme titled Child Slaves).

"To understand all is to forgive all." - French Proverb.

"To know all is not to forgive all. It is to despise everybody." - Quentin Crisp.

Retrospective inserts.

"Release yourself from the past and be free to live, love and move forward into the now. Forgiveness is a state of being that emerges from love. It can only come from a heart that is open and that has totally let go of the burden of anger and resentment. This doesn't mean we will never feel anger or resentment again, but that we no longer hold onto the anger. Instead we seek to return to love, harmony and wholeness." – Paul Adkins.

I feel icy
I feel cold
I feel old
Is there something there behind me?
I'm sublime
I feel empty
I feel dark
I remark
I am mesmerized
By my own beat
Like a heartbeat
(In it's own beat)

"Heartbeat" as written by Colin Newman

Lyrics © CARLIN AMERICA INC

In Touch with Raynor C. Johnson by Sheila Gwillam (Light Publishing, London, U.K., 1996).

Forgiveness

p.157. It is when you can remember without the pain that you know you’ve truly forgiven. But this does not mean that you must be gullible in any way, you know. If you’ve learned from your experience you will not let people take advantage of you for their sakes in future. It does not mean you have to be fools in any way. You have the responsibility, the added responsibility of not allowing that younger soul to repeat the same mistake with you.

p.180-181. Of course just saying that you have forgiven doesn’t exactly mean that you have forgiven, but each person who has passed judgement on the situation will be laying up more karma for themselves. It is a way in which they will learn eventually, not necessarily in this lifetime, of the dangers of passing judgement without knowing what has gone before...the thought-forms that people are projecting into the surrounding etheric world - and some of these thought-forms are filled with a great deal of anger and hate - collect together; they are drawn together as like to like and they form pockets of energy where there is no light; they block out the light...the more you surround yourself the more you can affect the surrounding area that you’re in, and you can leave your energies and your imprints upon all the physical objects around you and you can affect the people you’re with. But you need to grow stable so that you will be able to hold the light even if you’re challenged, by being in a room full of darkened people, so that your light affects them but their darkness does not affect you.

“The sage does not expect that others use his criteria as their own.” - Laozi.

The Practice of Tonglen.

“Each of us has a ‘soft spot’: the place in our experience where we feel vulnerable and tender. This soft spot is inherent in appreciation and love, and it is equally inherent in pain. Often, when we feel that soft spot, it's quickly followed by a feeling of fear and an involuntary, habitual tendency to close down. This is the tendency of all living things: to avoid pain and cling to pleasure. In practice, however, covering up the soft spot means shutting down against out life experience. Then we tend to narrow down into a solid feeling of self against other. One very powerful and effective way to work with tendency to push away pain and hold onto pleasure is the practice of tonglen. Tonglen is a Tibetan word that literally means ‘sending and taking.’ The practice originated in India and came to Tibet in the eleventh century. In tonglen practice, when we see or feel suffering, we breathe in with the notion of completely feeling it, accepting it, and owning it. Then we breathe out, radiating compassion, lovingkindness, freshness; anything that encourages relaxation and openness.” - Pema Chodron (When Things Fall Apart. Heart Advice for Difficult Times).

“On-the-spot tonglen means that you just don't rush by; you actually breathe in with the wish that this person can be free of suffering, and send them out some kind of good heart or well-being...When you do tonglen on the spot, you simply breathe in and breathe out, taking in pain and sending out spaciousness and relief.” - Pema Chodron (ibid).

Apparently, there are different styles of Tonglen. It is a Buddhist method of practising compassion. It is possible to practise some form of Tonglen without the breathing, just using statements, attitudes, beliefs and sentiments in the spirit of Tonglen. When one feels comfortable, there are methods at one’s disposal for transforming that feeling. I would suggest that it is a way to accept and observe pain and discomfort whilst embracing the oneness of life and expanding one’s concern beyond self. Other people are suffering too. By awakening love and compassion for others, including those who seek to harm or irritate us, we are helping not only to release ourselves from negative emotions, but also helping others to grow. We can protect ourselves from harm by employing such methods whilst simultaneously doing out bit to alleviate the burden that collective humanity is carrying on its shoulders. Such a practice can help also to release joy and power in us, as well as divine love. These are qualities of the Higher Self, of the God within, the eternal reality that we know on a higher level. Ultimately, this is an opportunity to move towards the state of enlightenment in which we are centred in these expressions of true Being permanently, with no negative reactions, fears, prejudices or other personal inhibitions and blockages. When we are kind to ourselves, we can be kind to others. Kindness is not to be confused with weakness. We also need strength and self-discipline in order to fulfil our life’s purpose and to be conscious of everything that is taking place within us and outside of us. When we are conscious of both our merits and faults, we shed light on the latter and slowly transform them. In the meantime, we are not at their mercy as much as when we were more dependent on our unconscious. Denying their existence or expression prevents us from being totally ourselves and only by being all that we are can we continue to increase our self-awareness and deepen our individuality. Self-control is conscious and assists personal growth; repression is unconscious and is an obstacle to growth. As Deepak Chopra says: "Within everyone there is light and shadow, good and evil, love and hate. In order to be truthful, you must embrace your total being. A person who exhibits both positive and negative qualities, strengths and weaknesses is not flawed, but complete."

Wisdom is there to be used and applied. I’m a self-absorbed loner and creative person concerned with deepening my individuality until, like the stem of a flower, I finally blossom, radiating joy, power and love, and share my beauty and fragrance with the world, simply by being. Life is about realising one’s spiritual nature, that much I know. And there are as many paths as there are individuals, many apparently contrary ways to arrive at ‘perfection.’ I have no interest in adopting a religious teaching or practice. However, I certainly seek to apply some of the principles of Daoism in my life. This seems to be my personal quest spiritually. Not that I appear to have much success at this stage of my life’s journey. So, in the meantime, I find myself being drawn to various, often more accessible, teachings that help to improve my understanding of life. They feel like stepping stones beneath my feet, preparing me for a time when I am able to let go of everything and just relax, remain calm and centred, and see through the illusions that we have all created. “Don´t try to use what you learn from Buddhism to be a Buddhist; use it to be a better whatever-you-already-are,” counsels the Dalai Lama. Buddhism’s emphasis on patience and tolerance seems to reflect the earth element while Daoism’s attitude of stillness and yielding relate to the alchemical element water. One is strong and reliable; the other is soft and serene as well as pliable. One sustains all living things; the other nourishes all life.

“A great rock is not disturbed by the wind; the mind of a wise man is not disturbed by either honour or abuse,” says the Dalai Lama; that is, control and withstand negative emotions. “The fundamental philosophical principle of Buddhism is that all our suffering comes about as a result of an undisciplined mind,” he explains, “and this untamed mind itself comes about because of ignorance and negative emotions. For the Buddhist practitioner then, regardless of whether he or she follows the approach of the Fundamental Vehicle, Mahayana or Vajrayana, negative emotions are always the true enemy, a factor that has to be overcome and eliminated. And it is only by applying methods for training the mind that these negative emotions can be dispelled and eliminated. This is why in Buddhist writings and teachings we find such an extensive explanation of the mind and its different processes and functions. Since these negative emotions are states of mind, the method or technique for overcoming them must be developed from within. There is no alternative. They cannot be removed by some external technique, like a surgical operation.” Daoism tends to emphasise the water element, pure feeling and the depth and oneness of consciousness. “Nothing is softer or more flexible than water, yet nothing can resist it,” Laozi offers in the Daodejing. The Buddha adapted his teachings for whichever people he encountered and the Dalai Lama, with his Tibetan emphasis on compassion, has also said, “One has to try to develop one's inner feelings, which can be done simply by training one's mind. This is a priceless human asset and one you don't have to pay income tax on!” Perhaps this is the reason I share greater affinity both for Daoism and Tibetan Buddhism than other teachings (at least where the subject of this present book is concerned).

As a man, I am learning that will has its place, but it is like a wild stallion that is most difficult to tame and apply in a simple but effective way on an inner level without asserting it directly in reaction to experiences automatically. In other words, I recognise that a balanced perspective derives from being conscious on all levels, not simply that of the ego, which limits us to unconscious behaviour patterns alone. I simply want to know where I stand and to know as much as possible so that I may have an arsenal of possible responses to any negative conditions I may encounter. To me, the world is a hostile place and I can now see how many people simply spew out all their angst and neuroses in the hope of pulling others down so they might feel better themselves for a moment. In other words, they don’t know how or where else to release it all or they are driven largely by their animal instincts and have never really turned within themselves to draw upon the riches that are inside us all and which both ourselves and those around us with a greater feeling of contentment.

Apparently, there is a precept which some Buddhists observe to summon forth their fears by praying for experiences that trigger them so that they can release and deal with anything that is holding them back in preparation for spiritual awakening. Concerning the practice of tonglen, I am reminded that trees love to receive negative energy because they derive energy from transforming it. So, spitting or pissing on a tree is welcomed. The tree will thank you. Perhaps, if we were all as strong and wise as trees we would feel the same way!

.“However, once you do become ill, practices such as Tong-Len can make a significant difference in how you respond to the situation of illness in terms of your mental attitude. Instead of moaning about your situation, feeling sorry for yourself and being overwhelmed by anxiety and worry, you can, in fact, save yourself from additional mental pain and suffering by adopting the right attitude. Practising Tong-Len meditation, or ‘giving and receiving,’ may not necessarily succeed in alleviating the real physical pain or lead to  cure in physical terms, but what it can do is protect you from unnecessary additional psychological pain, suffering and anguish.” – The Dalai Lama (The Art of Happiness. A Handbook for Living by The Dalai Lama and Howard C. Cutler Riverhead Books, New York, U.S., 1998, p.204).

“That is all I want in life: for this pain to seem purposeful.” - Elizabeth Wurtzel. 

“Be aware that with every incarnation you take on no more than you are prepared for, and those of you present at this time have chosen it as your last opportunity to clear your karmic responsibilities. There is so much happening that it is bound to appear chaotic, not least of all with the attempts of the dark forces to take your focus away from your goal. You will therefore realise that what you are going through is not at all unusual in the circumstances. Within all that is happening the plan is still working that will raise you to the higher dimensions. Your final days are to be very rewarding, and all that you have wished for that is of the Light will be yours. Your consciousness levels are ever increasing as higher energies are beamed to you from afar. Dear Ones, you cannot fail if you have set your sights on ascending, and have dedicated yourselves to doing so.” - SaLuSa (channelled through Mike Quinsey, 2 December 2009, www.gfbymikequinsey.blogspot.com/2009/12/02-december-2009-salusa.html). 

“Egos may clash, or agree, but their influence in the greater scheme of your incarnational group is tiny, because ego-driven or ego-guided activities and responses just distract you from your true life purpose. They bog you down in an emotional swamp, where you find yourselves apparently needing to attack others or defend yourselves from the attacks of others, and in which judgement, blame, and condemnation of others’ wrong views and behaviours must be encouraged and promoted - to bring peace! You only have to observe how this egoic behaviour divides and separates people into warring factions in your illusory reality to understand what a waste of time and energy it is. Love, acceptance, compassion, and forgiveness will lead you forward on your spiritual path, whereas egoic behaviour just anchors you in the emotional swamp until you decide to let go, pull up your anchor, and move forward again. Waiting for others to make the first loving move does not work in an environment where all feel threatened and are on the defensive. So weigh your own anchor, move forward with loving kindness, and be one of the wayshowers to full consciousness - your divine destination.” – Saul (channelled through John Smallman, ‘Everything you think, say and do affects many others,’ 16 May 2010, www.johnsmallman.wordpress.com).

“There is great humour in highly evolved energies, especially those who work with the love frequency. It can be recognised as a trademark. With energies you encounter, make sure there is an expansive sense of humour, for laughter is a key to freedom. There’s plenty of room for joy in all of existence and this is a concept you are seeking to grasp. We encourage you to operate out of your feeling centre, your solar plexus or gut…You can instantly see that you alter your experience when you believe in, and find, opportunity in every event you create. We remind you that opportunity is often disguised as loss.” – The Pleiadians (Earth: Pleiadian Keys to the Living Library by Barbara Marciniak, Bear & Company, NM., U.S., 1994).