By Jennifer Hoffman
This article from a series of Uriel Heals newsletter articles that dealt with Indigos and Suicide. It is posted here at the request of the many parents, educators, teachers and healers who needed information on this important and difficult topic.
Indigos and Suicide, Part One
This is a difficult topic for me to write about because it reminds me of a particularly challenging period in my son's life when he contemplated suicide and the fear that I experienced wondering whether I would come home one day and find that he had gone through with it. While he never told me that it was a consideration, I knew that he often walked that fine line. There were things in his life that he could not reconcile and he had difficulty coping with. The possibility of suicide was, in his mind, an option because it would stop the pain that he was feeling. That is the downside of the extreme sensitivity that Indigos have--they feel their pain very deeply and become so wounded that they cannot find their way out of it. They consider suicide in moments of desperation, when they believe that no other solution is possible.
Indigos struggle with thoughts of suicide more than other generations before them. And many of them do follow through with the process, leaving a trail of grief behind them. They have trouble accepting things and since many Indigos have had difficult childhood experiences, their wounds are often painful and deep. Their empathic abilities serve to amplify the pain that they feel and add to it the pain of those around them. My son had many Indigo friends, many of whom were struggling with their own problems. I sometimes felt that he was processing his friends' emotions as well as his own. For three years we struggled with this problem, going through counseling, drug therapy (briefly) and spent much time talking. The drugs seemed to make things worse as Indigos can have unusual reactions to drugs and can also be intolerant of them. And, since they are prone to addiction, can also become addicted to many types of medication.
While my son did not commit suicide, he had several friends who did and it was a very sad and difficult experience for everyone. Each parent whose Indigo children go through emotional issues and painful experiences needs to understand that their children are unable to turn off their emotions as we have learned to do. And they also process the emotional energy around them, which they can believe is their own. Since they are highly empathic and intuitive, teaching them how to channel their empathic energy more effectively will help them to understand which emotional energy is theirs and what belongs to others. Effective communication between children and parents is always necessary with Indigo children because they can imagine all sorts of things and often have trouble distinguishing between reality and their beliefs and fears. Although they are highly intelligent, they also tend to be emotionally immature and need much more support than they will acknowledge. Through several years of talking, working through issues, teaching my son how to focus his empathic energy and letting him know that I was there for him, we were able to get through this difficult period and he is now well past it. It is a challenge that many parents of Indigos face but one that they can, with effort, help their children through. It is not easy but it can be done. Please write to me if you are experiencing this issue with your child-teen or young adult-and let me share what worked for me with you.
Indigos and Suicide, Part Two
Last week I wrote about Indigos and suicide, sharing with you my difficult and challenging experiences with my Indigo son and many of you wrote to me about your own experiences with your Indigo children. The pain, confusion and frustration that you shared with me had a common theme, many of you were writing about Indigo children who were in the eighteen to twenty year old age range. This is a particularly difficult age for Indigos, who are supposed to be leaving home and entering the world, but many of them are stuck, afraid to leave home. And they are depressed, drinking and/or using drugs or have simply dropped out and are not doing anything at all. As a generation, most of us were either in college or married at this age and we are frustrated with our children's behavior. And overwhelmed by and frightened at the depths of their depression, anger and apparent inability to move forward or to move out of the black hole that they seem to be in. Can we help them?
Some Indigos are intimidated by what they see as a challenge to meet or exceed their parents' successes and their parents represent a very successful generation. Others are afraid that they will not measure up to society's heavy expectations of this generation. Some just want to do exactly the opposite of what their parents are doing, not because they are trying to be difficult, but because they want to create their own path in life and they feel that doing what their parents are not doing is the best place to start. Still others simply do not know what they want to do and are overwhelmed by the vast range of options that they have and the challenge of choosing one thing and being successful at it, as their parents did. What if they don't like it-will they be stuck with it?
As a generation Indigos are a very creative, intuitive and motivated and they do everything with purpose and intention. So when they get stuck, they do it well. But they can be moved out of their black hole, with help. One thing that I have noticed is that many Indigos were bullied by their peers as children and they suffered for being 'different.' Whatever emotions they felt at the time they are carrying with them into their early adulthood and the fear of being bullied, of being persecuted for who they are, how they look or act, seems to have re-awakened in many of them. The solution that I have always proposed for parents of Indigo children is to communicate with them, to talk about their fears, learn where their interests lie, to reassure them and to help them learn to be comfortable with their differences. The Indigo energy will not conform to rules and regulations and they will not be able to work at jobs or careers that they do not like or that are not suited to their gifts and talents. But they are creative enough to find alternatives that suit them, if they are supported in their efforts. Rather than being frustrated with them, although their behavior is frustrating, we need to ask why they feel the way they do, instead of asking them what is wrong with them. This is a challenging situation for any parent and it can be made less difficult by making an effort that starts with communication. The situation will not be resolved overnight, but it will improve, over time. And your Indigo child may, like mine eventually did, climb out of the black hole, find their path and blossom into their creative energy.
Indigos and Suicide, Part Three
This continues this month's series on Indigos and Suicide. I have received so many messages from parents, teachers and healers that I was guided to write an additional commentary on this very important topic. Please note that while I have not written anything about Crystal children in some time it is because they are not at the same point in their evolution as the Indigos are. Indigo children, many now in their late teens and early adulthood, are reaching a crisis point now and they are struggling with their purpose in the world, their ability to carry out their mission and dealing with their gifts and talents. Many Indigos who contemplate suicide do so when they are deeply depressed-and depression is a big problem for Indigos. They can no longer make sense of their lives, themselves and see no future past their current situation. They do not know how to get from where they are to the next step in their lives. And, this is a generation that grew up on video games where they had to 'die' to get to the next level. Are they taking that concept into their reality, not understanding its implications?
While the Indigo energy is wonderfully creative when expressed positively, it can be very destructive in its negative expression. And that extends not only to the Indigos outer world, but also their inner world. They are often their own worst enemies, creating a host of problems and difficulties for themselves (and their parents). Indigos are a generation that requires involved parenting, where the parents need to be present in their lives in every sense, including emotionally. Most parents are stressed with demanding jobs and lifestyles and do not have time to be there for their children. This is when Indigos get into trouble. And they seem to deliberately push their parents away at the time when they are in greatest need of their insight and attention. When an Indigo says 'I can handle this' it usually means that they are over their heads and desperately need help, even though they won't ask for it and will accept it very reluctantly.
The tragedy of a child suicide is unthinkable, not only to the family but to society in general. These children have much to contribute and teach us and we need to be an active presence in their lives. When my Indigo son finally came out of his suicidal period, he wrote me a letter in which he expressed his gratitude at the unwavering love that I gave him, even when he was at his most unlovable and told me that he probably would not be here if it weren't for my efforts. As I write this, several years after receiving that letter, I am overcome with emotion because I know how much he suffered and how difficult it was for him to make the decision to stay. I had to convince him that his place was here, that moving to the next level meant finding the best outlet for his skills and gifts and together we worked on discovering what those were. We can help our children make the decision to stay, to find their path and create happiness, self-confidence and find their gifts, by teaching them that the next level is attainable by becoming who they are, finding or creating their path and living it with passion, no matter what it looks like. They also need to learn to accept the love and help of those who they chose as their parents and spiritual teachers by knowing that they there for them when they need it the most, whether or not they are willing to accept their help. They eventually will and the world will benefit from their experiences. They will also teach other Indigos how to get to the next level in their spiritual path by staying on this one. I hope that together we can help the Indigos and help them get past this difficult period and make suicide an option that they do not even consider.
About the author
Jennifer Hoffman is an intuitive, spiritual healer, mentor, teacher and author. She also channels the energy of the Archangel Uriel. Jennifer has helped many people through the Shift through her unique insights and counsel, facilitating their healing journey. Jennifer is the founder of www.urielheals.com, an on-line spiritual healing and growth center and dedicated to the messages and teachings of Archangel Uriel. Information about Jennifer's books, on-line seminars and services is available at her websites, or email healing@urielheals.com for information.
Article Copyright © 2007, 2008. by Jennifer Hoffman. All rights reserved.
Jennifer Hoffman is an intuitive, spiritual healer, mentor, teacher and author. She also channels the energy of the Archangel Uriel. Jennifer has helped many people through the Shift through her unique insights and counsel, facilitating their healing journey. Jennifer is the founder of www.urielheals.com, an on-line spiritual healing and growth center and dedicated to the messages and teachings of Archangel Uriel. Information about Jennifer's books, on-line seminars and services is available at her websites, or email healing@urielheals.com for information.
Article Copyright © 2007, 2008. by Jennifer Hoffman. All rights reserved.
Related
No comments:
Post a Comment