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“Everyone loves a drink; no one
likes a drunk.”
"When you forgive, you in no
way change the past - but you sure do change the future." - Bernard
Meltzer.
When Pigsy moved in he didn’t like
me putting the recycling leaflet on the wall. I was doing him a favour since
only one came through the letterbox. He thought I was imposing
‘goody-two-shoes’ ideas on him. He didn’t like my non-physical orientation, fat
belly, etc, and shirt/jumper look in winter. He doesn’t like feeling he should
help anyone. And he hated the landlord asking him to lay carpet on the floor
[he had a low rent to do the flat up]. Their request gave him the perfect idea
for terror tactics: delay carpeting the floor for as long as possible and, in
the meantime, make a lot of noise. Deliberate intimidation. He also said he
intends to trash his flat when he moves just so the landlord won’t get all the
new stuff he has put in. He’s an angry, fucked up, violent, destructive
monster! Yet, the last Angel Card I
picked regarding all this was Forgiveness
and I just picked up the card ‘Tenderness.’
So, you just have to be firm inside and soft and gentle outside, yielding and
flexible in the realm of illusory forms but centred in the inner reality,
beyond form.
You hold a knife to my throat and
then call me a coward? [He made
‘chicken’ noises when he went out one day with his girlfriend and, another
time, banged on my door on the way out with her].
He’s jealous of/doesn’t like
educated people. He wants to prove that his way of living is best and makes him
more powerful. So he displays physical power, albeit cowardly with a knife, and
tries to make you feel powerless, weak, and feel that his way is better and
gives him joy, power and happiness you can’t have. He doesn’t realise it’s the
other way round, especially since you now, as a result, must draw on inner reserves of power, joy and light, and do this
through faith, strength and know-how.
“We often pretend to fear what we
really despise, and more often despise what we really fear.” - Charles Caleb
Colton.
If you have to talk to Pigsy, relate
to him as you would a disturbed child who misbehaves and is angry and
emotional. You can’t hit him as he’s only a child and doesn’t know any better.
He has a lot to learn. Be compassionate, patient and tolerant. Be strong
within. Eventually, he might repeat that. Live your life and be happy and at
peace. Do not be affected by his monstrous, childish games. If it comes to it,
you will call the police, not take revenge. He is nothing. He cannot affect you
inside, and the outside is nothing. Accept that. You appear to be weak because
you are gentle and practising non-action. You are focussing your centre, your
will, and he responds to that, to your ‘magic and faith.’ There is no need to
do anything. He relates to you as someone who he has conquered. Let him think
that. Don’t react. But, do your inner work to keep him at a distance - and
maybe he’ll go away!!
"Resolve
to be tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the
striving and tolerant with the weak and wrong. Sometime in your life, you will
have been all of these."
“Children, I grant, should be
innocent; but when the epithet is applied to men, or women, it is but a civil
term for weakness.” - Mary Shelley.
“I think, therefore I am...not
related to you.” - Author unknown.
“It is not death that a man should
fear never beginning to live.” - Marcus Aurelius.
“Do not fear death so much but
rather the inadequate life.” - Bertolt Brecht.
“Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, ‘Where have I gone wrong?’ Then
a voice says to me, ‘This is going to take more than one night.’" -
Charlie Brown, Peanuts (by Charles
Schulz).
20 December 2002.
Feeling horrified at the prospect of
Pigsy coming back and having to hear him come home and be in the house, etc,
his presence here, let alone the terrifying thought of ever having to see his
(ugly) face again.
Angel Card: Strength.
"I am alone and miserable; man
will not associate with me; but one as deformed and horrible as myself would
not deny herself to me. My companion must be of the same species and have the
same defects. This being you must create." - Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein (1918).
"’In a fit of enthusiastic
madness I created a rational creature and was bound towards him to assure, as
far as was in my power, his happiness and well-being...I refused, and I did
right in refusing, to create a companion for the first creature. He showed
unparalleled malignity and selfishness in evil; he destroyed my
friends...Miserable himself that he may render no other wretched, he ought to
die. The task of his destruction was mine, but I have failed.’" - Mary
Shelley’s Frankenstein.
Pigsy has problems and anything he
does to relate to you, however negatively, to express himself in relation to
you, to get your attention, whatever, is because he needs your help, peaceful,
refined qualities he needs to develop. Perhaps that’s why he’s been brought to
you - drawn by his Higher Self, escorted and arranged by the landlord and co,
as if bringing a student to teach. He expresses his fucked up subconscious,
especially when drunk and with his girlfriend. They’re in their late 40s and
they might both be alcoholics. He’s volatile and undisciplined, weak,
emotional. Like a patient - a clever one who was never locked away or put in a
mental institution, but who has been brought to you because it requires
healing/spiritual power. It is a job. It is a responsibility - like looking
after your ailing old psychotic mother in the years leading to her death.
[Retrospective note: Pigsy just wanted someone to take his shit out on and his
father was probably a drunk and did that to him every day at home when he was younger
so he is just blindly carrying on the family tradition because it gives him
temporary relief from his troubles. Betty Perkins’ book, Lion Taming, includes a wonderful Aikido story of unconditional
love calming a violent drunk and saving members of the public from further
assaults (p.136)].
“The drunkard, learning his alphabet
of the suffering caused by the dominance of the lower nature, is doing as
usefully in his own stage as is the saint in his, completing his last lesson in
earth’s school, and no more can justly be demanded from either than he is able
to perform. One is in the kindergarten stage, learning by object-lessons, while
the other is graduating, ready to leave his university; both are right for
their age and their place, and should be helped and sympathised with IN THEIR
PLACE. This is one of the lessons of what is known in occultism as
‘tolerance.’” - Annie Besant (The Ancient
Wisdom, 1897).
Retrospective
inserts.
A driver from Bangladesh in
one of the cab companies I repped for was sent to collect Neil Morrissey was
told he was picking up one of the guys in Men Behaving Badly. He responded
gravely over his radio, ‘No, I don’t take man behaving badly,’ believing it was
a drunken lout even though the collection point was a posh restaurant. Bless!
The
signs of an intuitive empathy – notes from a talk by Dr. Judith Orloff MD (YouTube video).
1.You’ve been labelled overly
sensitive all your life.
2.You go home to recharge your energy
rather than recharging with other people. You need to be alone to recharge
energy (and you also absorb the energy of others).
3.You are very sensitive to smells,
excessive talking or loud sounds; for example, people talking loudly in your
face.
4.You need to get away from people
after 3 hours (a form of self-nurturing and a way to protect your energy).
You “need to protect your energy by
nurturing these qualities and by learning to breathe out negativity. You have
to let all the negativity out though the breath.” Another activity Dr. Orloff
suggests is meditation as a centring process, just for a few minutes, to allow
the negativity to leave your body. Set firm but kind boundaries for people so
you don’t get overwhelmed by them. Use simple techniques of love and mindfulness
so you don’t become overwhelmed by an insensitive world. Instead of using food
to centre yourself, meditate for a couple of minutes, or breathe negative
energy out. Water also helps to get rid of it, she says. (Judith is a
psychiatrist at the University
of California, in Los Angeles. Her
beautiful energy and wealth of wisdom are immediately apparent. She is the
author of Positive Energy and Guide to Intuitive Healing, published by
Harmony).
There are three steps in the
creative process, explains Abraham-Hicks. Firstly, we must ask. Secondly, the
energy of Source answers the asking. Thirdly, we must be in receiving mode and
allow and this is where our real work lies. In order to become a vibrational
match for that which we want it is important that we do not attract what we do
not want by focussing on that instead! Unless we attune our receiver to the
same wavelength as the transmitter, says Abraham, we will not get a clear
signal. When we can feel the alignment of our emotions with what we are
continually asking for (we cannot stop asking, says Abraham, since the very
contrast we experience in this world evokes the desire from us) there will no
longer be any static interference. The path to manifestation will have been
cleared.
“A guy
walks into a bar, sits down and has a drink. Suddenly, a man hollers at him, ‘I
screwed your mom last night!’ Disturbed, the man tries to ignore him.
Again, he hears, ‘Your mom was
good in bed last night!’ Again, he tries to ignore it.
The man is just about to speak
again but the guy stops him and says, ‘Dad, go home, you're drunk!’”
– Unknown.
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