By Molly The Heathen, 8 August 2013
Dear fellow starseeds, I have a little story to tell you.
First of all, I would like to say that I am perfectly sane. I don't suffer from delusions, ideations, paranoia (although some would say this defines a case of paranoia), hallucinations of any kind, or suicidal depression, and I know I am taking a risk in disclosing this because of the judgements that could be made about my mental health, but for the sake of sanity in the broadest sense, I am taking the risk.
A few nights ago I awoke in the middle of the night (which for me is actually in the early hours of the morning), or between 2 and 4 a.m., I would guess. I didn't look at a clock as I don't have one, except for on my phone, and I didn't bother to switch this on to find out.
Anyway, unusally for me, I awoke for no apparent reason, but I seemed to just awaken very suddenly, without apparent cause, and I was wide awake, eyes open, just looking around the room in the darkness, as if I'd been awake for much longer. For a few seconds, I just lay there, and noticed I had a slight headache, which I put down to tiredness, because I 'should' have been asleep, after all. But I felt different - empty, desolate, and just not myself. Then I heard an 'inner voice' which said to me, "There is no reason for you to exist. Your life is meaningless. You are just filling in time. Everything is pointless." Now at the time 'I' was thinking these thoughts which just came suddenly into my mind out of the blue, I wasn't feeling anything at all, absolutely nothing, just a curious emptiness as if I had no emotions, like they had been switched off.
This struck me as very odd, and as I say, I didn't feel myself at all, but neither did I 'feel' suicidal as I had no feelings whatsoever except this curious sense of being empty which I didn't recognise as being a part of me. However, the thoughts which were being conveyed to me seemed perfectly logical and reasonable at the time, just as if someone had suggested I might go to the kitchen and fix myself glass of water rather than end my life. As mundane but as reasonable as that.
So as the thoughts were coming I found my own thoughts kicking in. At first my reaction was, "Yes, why don't I, I could just get a knife and slit my wrists now and then it would be done, and I wouldn't just be wasting my life any more, taking up space". Then my own logic started to kick in, and with it the awareness of the lack of emotion involved.. I questioned if this was really what I wanted to do, since I didn't 'feel' suicidal, and then proceeded to have a conversation with myself about why I should actually continue to exist.
The way that I experienced these thoughts were as if they had been transmitted to me, rather than things which had an organic origin from within my own being; and this is the way I feel about them now, as artificial thoughts, or ones that didn't originate in my own mind. Why would I just suddenly awaken in the middle of the night without just cause (not hearing a noise, not needing the bathroom, etc.) and then within seconds be thinking these thoughts? I never awaken to such a degree from a deep sleep and without just cause. It was just bizarre.
The next day I took steps to disengage from this frequency manipulation, to prevent it returning, through meditation and programing an object to protect me in my space (won't say what the object is here, as this thing is working so far and I don't want it undermined - ok I am just a tad paranoid now, I admit!) and as yet I have not had any more problems, and nor am I expecting any.
I cannot locate the origin of the messages or who is behind it, and I'm not sure I want to, but I believe it was a 'suicide frequency wave' (scalar mind control weaponry) I became aware of, that would normally bypass the conscious mind but for some reason it didn't bypass mine.
More here. Especially go to part 8. www.angelfire.com/oz/cv/scalarweapons.html
I believe I woke up because the frequency of the thoughts and sense of emptiness being transmitted into my energy field was so different to my own energy pattern that it interfered with my normal sleeping function and triggered me onto alert mode, having been subconsciously recognised as an invading presence. But also to alert others that those of us, especially those who are accessing levels of consciousness which challenge the integrity of the various negative agendas out there, those of us who are starseeds, telepaths and the like, who naturally tune into different frequencies from a wider band width than those of most or many other humans, need to be more careful and diligent about their own protection. So this is why I'm bringing this to light.
The vulnerability of starseeds to manipulation and attack, in particular must be noted, especially, as this group is I feel being targeted by mind control technology and surveillance, to monitor and alter thought patterns and behavior more than any other. Their innate psychic and spiritual powers, their knowledge of the power of love and therefore of their own tremendous power, together with their missions to raise the vibration and consciousness of humanity, the very thing which undermines the low frequency of the powers that be, is seen as a real threat, especially as these elite controllers have the ability to look down the strongest timelines to see possible positive future outcomes set into motion by such individuals. These must never be allowed to play out to that extent. Their very talents and proclivities which allow them to influence people and events, also have a unique etheric signature, which, just like everyone else, can be scanned and recognised by the scalar technology that has been developed, and many of them are disabled or even eliminated, and certainly attempts are made to do so.
I hope I haven't scared anyone too much, but I felt I wanted to share my experience because an attempt was made to undermine my existence here, I feel, and I circumvented it which has positive connotations for us all. This warning comes in the wake of a feeling of being under surveillance more and more lately, especially online, and of me possibly deciding to lie low more, not express my own opinions so readily online, or otherwise shine my own light so publicly at times. So if I disappear off the site altogether, or just become quieter (always difficult for me) this could be the reason why. It won't be because I have succumbed to this psychic warfare by actually ending my existence here, but just to lie low for as long as I need to. Just to let you know!
Namaste all, and may we all be protected in the loving embrace of the divine for the duration of our existences here. Blessings to all and everything.