MotherShip by Sam Wise ___ PLEASE REFRESH PAGE FOR WEB FONTS

Wednesday, 30 December 2015

Monstaville Book III. Chapter 31


31

"Remember all ye that existence is pure joy; that all the sorrows are but as shadows; they pass & are done; but there is that which remains."
- Liber AL II:9 (The Book of the Law by Aleister Crowley).


13 August. Saturday. I was woken up at 7.30 a.m. by yelling outside. When I finally got up and opened the curtains I saw the builder I had spoken to a couple of days ago across the street and the daughter of the couple who live there talking to each other so excitedly that I wondered if it was a row. But then I heard the girl laugh. They were almost shouting and the window was wide open as usual. I really needed a lie-in this morning. Needless to say, my first words whilst lying in bed were angry profanities! The noise went on until about five minutes after the guy saw me open the net curtains and watch them for a minute or so trying to figure out what was going on; that is, at about 8.45 a.m. I realised that the reason the prayers on their stereo were reaching me and pervading my headspace was that the rooms upstairs in which they are working are empty. Of course! There is no furniture or anything in there to dampen the sound.

Three men turned up early in the evening, let themselves in and went upstairs. They left after about five minutes in a black Audi six-seater. Two returned later in the evening and were talking loudly upstairs. I had my headphones on for a while and, when I took them off, I listened to the last two songs on the CD through the speakers. This was about 10.30 p.m. The talking was so loud that I decided to turn the music up for the next CD because I was wondering what the fuck was going on! And, basically, no one warned me that there would be someone staying overnight upstairs. I thought, perhaps, that the builders had the key and decided to check out the local pubs and one of them stayed in the empty flat to which they had access. But, I grew increasingly concerned that the house had been sold to this guy with the Audi (I couldn’t tell if he was Asian or what) and he had immediately taken action to force me out. The man could have been a thug who was waiting for me to come out of my flat. Or, I considered, perhaps he intended to change the locks if I went out? It felt like I was in a precarious position. I didn’t turn my music off until 1.40 a.m. partly because the Ha Chus were also having a get-together with their daughters and friends and I would not have been able to get to sleep anyway.

I asked for Archangel Michael’s protection before going to sleep. Something weird happened. I was woken up at about 5.30 a.m. by an exceedingly loud ‘thud.’ I had no idea what it was or where it had come from but assumed that the noise came from upstairs. I had noticed during the day that my Sekhmet statue was leaning backwards. The base is wonky so she stands up with the help of some bluetac! I straightened it up and pushed it firmly down against the bluetac, believing this would last several months at least. I could not get back to sleep. My angst regarding the guy upstairs in a flat with no furniture and no bed or anything caught fire and turned into adrenalin. When I got up I found that my Sekhmet statue had fallen over onto the ioniser and hollow chest of drawers with its thin wooden top. The Eastern European man left at 6.53 a.m. He walked toward town. It looks like he is in his 50s but walks not unlike a thug! Mind you, he hadn’t had much sleep and probably thought I had deliberately made that banging noise to wake him up! He came back later the following evening at six minutes past midnight. I listened to music until about 2 a.m. and the guy was still walking around up there at 3 a.m. Doing what? I wondered.

15 August. Loud fake coughing from Maltesers at 11.32 p.m. for six minutes, off and on. This morning, driven by adrenalin, I was determined to find out why there’s a guy upstairs and what he’s doing here. If he was, indeed, a thug, I figured he would have been stationed there by the new landlord. When a guy from the estate agents brought yet another surveyor round on Friday and told me that they needed to sort this out quickly now because the owner needed to get finance to do some building upstairs I assumed that he was referring to whoever had bought the house. In fact, I asked him if it was a company because that was what he seemed to be implying and he answered yes. I had no idea he meant the company I already knew had purchased the property in order to try and sell it on.

So, anyway, I phoned the director of the property company who had been bringing all these potential buyers round to view the place, because I had his number from when he had called and texted me. I asked him if someone had bought the property and he said no. So I then explained that there was a man living upstairs, that he was Eastern European and had been accompanied by two others when he arrived and that no one had warned me that someone would be staying there with no bed or furniture. The person I was speaking to said he had just got back from holiday and did not know anything about it but said that the builders had been given a key so it was probably them. He went off to find out and shortly afterwards the man upstairs went out. I called back impulsively and was told that one of his colleagues had told the builder it would be okay for his friend from Bulgaria to stay for a few days until he found him somewhere permanent to live. He said he would be here for about four days and that they were under no obligation to inform me of anyone new living upstairs. I explained that my previous tenant had tried to get me out and that I was aware of the danger that if someone bought the property they could well try and use force to get me out. I mentioned something about my tenancy agreement. He said he did not know anything regarding my rights as a long-term tenant and would need to go and find out. I agreed that I would do the same and he would come round next week to discuss how I was going to move on into future. I got the impression that he was going to bring a new tenancy agreement for me to sign but that he might also discuss other options with me, like offering me a large sum of money!

16 August. The Eastern European guy came back at 11.32 p.m. It was still a bit of a shock since no one is ‘supposed’ to be living up there. Then, one minute later, Maltesers sent me a couple of fake coughs.

17 August. A young man in his 20s was pronounced dead at 9 p.m. last night after being shot with a Taser and then taken to hospital because he was feeling unwell. He had been arrested after Cumbria Police received reports that a man was causing criminal damage.

“From the rioting and other acts of defiance against the authorities, you are seeing how unsettling the changing times can be. There is a sense of knowing that the fabric of society is collapsing, but very few understand that it must happen if you are to go forward. The future therefore looks bleak, whereas it is full of promise that will establish a new society that will be reflect the Love and Light growing upon Earth. You are the Children Of God, so how else could it be as you are fully capable of bringing your real self that is your Godself into being. You are not your body but a glorious Being of Light seeking the pathway back to the higher realms, your true home.” - SaLuSa (channelled through Mike Quinsey, 17 August 2011, www.gfbymikequinsey.blogspot.com).

Well, yesterday, I went to the local council’s Housing Advice Centre. I took all the documents I have with me. I was told that the tenancy agreement I signed in 2001 without noticing that it was dated, in ink, ‘1998’ (on a form issued in 1999!) is valid. They became mandatory and, in fact, the note of ‘acceptance’ I received with my rent book when I moved in meant very little. I had not been given a tenancy agreement. So, prior to 2001, they could easily just force tenants out without any notice. But, now, the tenant is protected and the case would go to court. Another thing I found out is that, before 1991, it WAS possible for a long-term ‘sitting tenant’ to command a sum of money to move out. But landlords complained that it was costing them too much. I believe their rent was also protected. Consequently, anyone whose tenancy dates back to a period prior to that year [or, it seems, 1988, when the law was changed, as a friend tells me, to enable people to move around and find a flat more easily], retains those rights thus decreasing the price of the house dramatically. I was told that I could be evicted at any time and that the landlord could also put the rent up to the going rate at any time! Yep, a sudden hike which, for me, would have meant a further £40 a week! She said that the introduction of shorthold tenancy agreements for both furnished and unfurnished accommodation protected the tenant by ensuring that they received due notice to vacate. I don’t think, when I moved in, that this applied to unfurnished places and I always thought it meant that the tenant had more rights, partly because the presence of their own furniture meant reinforced the idea that it was their home. A tenant had to be given two months notice and if he or she objected to the grounds for the eviction it would go to court and take a further month to eject them! Well, I already knew that it could take five months from my internet search a little while ago.

I queried the housing officer a few times in bewilderment that there were no special rights in place for long-term tenants and left the building in disbelief! I bumped into a former work colleague in the local supermarket shortly afterwards and discussed my predicament with him. He immediately launched into his own horror stories with regard to mean landlords back in the 70s! One decided to sell the house and intimidated the tenants to persuade them to move out. He did not succeed, however. After a few of these experiences my friend managed to borrow £10,000 from his father to put a deposit down on a house because he felt he has sufficient job security. Luckily, his father gave him the money (he never paid it back). He advised me to go to the Citizens Advice Bureau to see if I could talk to a specialist in this area and also said that I could try writing to my local MP because he might have access to the information I required. I decided to try these options and also phone my local councillor. The MP might take time to reply.


This morning, I found a few CABs within a few miles of each other. The one where I live is so burdened that one is advised to start queuing at 6 or 7 a.m.! Go figure! (I’ve never said ‘Go figure’ in my life before – I swear!). One is so small that it only opens for two hours each week. The other one seems to accept appointments but I could not get through and decided to try again later. The director of the property company turned up on the doorstep in the late morning today with the builder and a couple of colleagues. They wanted to check something at the back of the house. Afterwards, he came in for a private chat and told me upfront that they did intend to evict me at some point so I might want to think about finding somewhere else to live. He asked me if I had found any information about my rights. I said that I had made an enquiry the day before but still had a couple of other places to go (namely, I intended to write to my MP and visit a local Citizens Advice Bureau). He told me he had asked a colleague about tenancy contracts and ‘found out’ although not long afterwards he also explained that they had bought one property from the same landlord (previously he had said a ‘couple’) which had also had a sitting tenant in. Whether this was true or not I had no idea but it sounded feasible. He told me that it had taken them eight months to get him out through the courts. Well, I already realised that I probably didn’t have any special rights as a long-term tenant and he asked why should I? which I found a tad conservative and mercenary. I said that the poor guy had no money and his back was against the wall so he had no choice and I was in the same position. He gave me a couple of options which amounted to moving now or waiting for them to evict me. He said the builders could be noisy upstairs and I told him I figured I would have to turn my music up to cover it up which he didn’t look very happy about, particularly after hearing about my loud music over the weekend from his Bulgarian builder!

"There is nothing more sacred than love and laughter, and there is nothing more prayerful than playfulness." - Osho.

I said that this house should not be divided into flats because it has Victorian-thin walls. He told me that one would not be permitted to turn such a house into flats now but that the leases were still valid and that the house would be worth more if he sold each flat separately rather than turning it back into a house. He added that he could make more money from two flats. I said that the thin walls and ceilings were a nightmare but he is a businessman and it’s just about money. He does not seem to think that is his problem. I asked him why my previous landlord would have intimidated me and even used threats of violence (via Pigsy) to get me out when all they had to do was give me two months notice. He did not answer. He said that if they had succeeded in selling the property the new landlord could well have been nastier and used more intimidation to force me out. So I was lucky!

It may be that my former scheming landlord could not simply evict me because they could not face a court case which could, potentially, take eight months, cost a few grand and feasibly bring scrutiny to their archaic business practices because some may be illegal (including tax evasion perhaps!). And, perhaps, they have a guilty conscience about forcing lots of people out of their homes and cannot face facing up to that! And perhaps the landlord’s incompetent son could screw things up. Another wild card might be that I suddenly produce evidence via my bank statements that they fiddled the rent books and made me pay hundreds of pounds extra over the last two or three years. And, yet another is the fact that they know I have written ‘a book’ on my experiences of intimidation living here even though I have not suggested that they were responsible for it. So, perhaps they wished to avoid making me an open enemy. They have been shrewd enough to use sufficiently subtle, tried-and-tested, tactics so that I could not prove anything. But one can only go on for so long and then the risks of being caught out increase because the same strategies have to be repeated and become more likely to be perceived as the calculated actions that they are. Plus, they really needed to sell these last remaining properties in this area and prune the business to make it more manageable for the son to take over. Or, it has occurred to me that perhaps they did not want to go through an eight-month court case with someone they have known for a long time and, at least for a while, got on with just fine.

The Bulgarian guy upstairs jumped on the floor or something at 11.45 p.m. which was quite loud! He then coughed a bit at five-past-midnight which was also loud. He sleeps in that front room above me. I even heard him snoring for a few hours a couple of days ago!

18 August. The Bulgarian man woke me up at three-minutes-to-six when he got up and seemed to stamp on the floor before walking around heavily (in shoes, surely?). He came back exactly one hour later and then went out again and 7.35 a.m. pulling a trolley which I assumed must be his suitcase. He was leaving. Um, I did shout up yesterday when he was walking heavily in shoes. I mean, that had not been an issue before and I did get the impression that all this noise over the last couple of days might be payback for my loud music at the weekend. Who knows? Loud fake coughs from Maltesers again around 11.30 just before the son drove off. Charming! I contemplated violence for a moment but let go of it and just said ‘bless you.’

“A day without laughter is a day wasted.” - Charlie Chaplin.

OK, so this entire saga is finally being wrapped up! FINALLY!!

Actually, the neighbours are still knocking on the wall between 11 and 11.30 each night and sometimes as late as 12 or 12.30.

19 August. A man was changing the lock next door when I arrived home at about 1 p.m. today. He took me to see the window that had been smashed at the back of the house by some thief who went away empty-handed. We both looked around in amazement at the squalor that the Bengali family must have lived in. The damp must have been there but by now the ceiling had caved in in the kitchen from it and the place was very dirty and had brown tar stains all over the walls and ceilings from excessive cigarette-smoking over the years. I was informed that they didn’t keep up their mortgage payments so it has been repossessed by the bank and is going back on the market. Basically, they abandoned it because they did not want it after, as the seller, they lost out due to the estate agent’s greed.

23 August. At 11.50 p.m., Ha Chu’s son, Loudmouth and a man with a beard and wearing his Muslim kit stood talking outside my flat for ten minutes. Loudmouth, of course, was the loudest person talking and ‘coughed’ a few times which sounded deliberate and fake to me. I asked God to send them away and they left immediately, so perhaps my request was answered!

25 August. At 11.06 p.m., Loudmouth went out to his car which was parked in the space outside my flat and I could hear children and adults saying their goodbyes next door. He ‘coughed’ a couple of times, just like last night. I opened the curtain and the net curtain and when he saw me I stuck my middle finger up at him! He, in turn, made a gesture and seemed to say, ‘What?’ in a patronising manner. I was going to drop it but couldn’t. I went outside, not knowing what I was going to do. After pausing by the front door for a moment, I made my way down to the end of the path to the pavement just to try and scare him. He said, “Are you alright mate?” or something and I did not answer. I looked at the old man who had walked to the car and then, turning, at a little girl as she appeared on the pavement from the Ha Chu’s driveway as if changing my mind on their account. Hopefully, I scared him a bit. He is quite tall and cocky but I reckon he is all mouth and bravado, and a real dumbass, but, hopefully, he got the message that just because I would not confront an old man or women physically, there is nothing to stop me teaching him a lesson.

27 August. 6.49 p.m. Some beardy guy wearing a black skullcap walked past talking on his phone at the top of his voice – and I mean like a goddamn foghorn! I got up and shouted ‘Fuck off!’ out of the window, spitting a bit of food out in the process! No civilised human being should have to live in a place like this! He walked back the other way at 6.54 and I got up and shouted ‘Piss off’ this time. He was still yelling down his phone as he turned the corner down the end of the street.  A friend who lives locally told me recently that he would love to get away from London as well because it’s just so overcrowded now and everyone is competing for space and other things.


30 August. Loudmouth arrived just before 9 p.m. and was talking to the Ha Chus outside my flat. He ‘coughed’ a bit. So, I put some music on, quite loud, in both rooms. The second CD I played stopped just after 11 p.m. and Loudmouth left shortly afterwards and ‘coughed’ loudly out in the street. The heathern barbarians! Well, if the neighbours like my loud music that much let them enjoy it! It has also occurred to me that pepper is supposed to make one sneeze! Hmm…perhaps that’s Ha Chu’s secret!

31 August. My Joy Division CD ended at 11.45 p.m. and Maltesers ‘coughed’ immediately afterwards and then again two minutes later – very loudly. And again two minutes after that! I wonder what she takes for that!!

'Laugh, because that is the purest sound.’ – Hafiz.

3 September. Saturday. The builders upstairs turned their radio up loud around 9 a.m. and I went upstairs to ask them to turn it down. The guy I chatted to the other day is still here and a new guy has joined him to help with the next stage (reconstructing the walls I imagine). It was the latter who opened the door. He answered with a question: did I mean all day? I said yes I meant all day and my anger surfaced and I told him I would get angry otherwise. Fuck it, I am managing to put up with all the banging - I don’t see why I should have to endure loud music as well! In fact, I appear to be able to cope quite well with natural – innocent - sounds. The guy from the property company asked me how I was coping and I said surprisingly well except that I need an hour to meditate each day, which is a problem. Anyway, the result was that they turned the radio down but then turned it up again around 2 p.m.

5 September. Yeah! I heard their radio today - when there was a delivery and they opened the door to come down and collect it. Their radio was on fairly loud but not loud enough to come through the ceiling and disturb me. And that is with no furniture to dampen the sound. So they should be content with that. In other words, on Saturday, they had their radio turned up extremely loud! Ha Chu ‘sneezed’ at 10.48 p.m. I think they may have to be going to bed earlier at the moment due to the builders starting work at 8 a.m. each day!

7 September. The builders turned their radio up too loud again. I played some music (The Pearl by Harold Budd and Brian Eno) for an hour so I could meditate but it was on low volume although there was some blues music on the audio tape that was a bit louder. They turned their radio up really loud. I did not even finish my meditation because it was disturbing me. Instead, I got up and played some goth and heavy metal music for a couple of hours, whacking the volume up (just in case they were interested in listening to MY music – through the ceiling of course!). Around 10.10 p.m., a man - presumably Loudmouth - coughed loudly outside as people were leaving from next door. And, then, at 10.46, an Asian man walked past talking at the top of his voice on a mobile phone. It sounded like the guy who did this recently. A serial cell-phone yeller!

8 September. One of the builders was banging metal together in the front garden not far from my window early this morning while I was still in bed. One or both sang loudly but briefly here and there all morning – until their boss arrived. It was back to normal for the afternoon. I heard the radio up there again when they opened the door and it was loud enough. There is absolutely no reason for them to turn the volume right up, particularly when someone is at home downstairs. Yes, HOME motherfuckers!!

9 September. I needed to have a bath this morning and they had the radio on quite loud right above my bathroom so I had to go and ask for ‘permission’ to have a bath! I asked them to turn it down so I could have a bath and they agreed but both looked at me as though they were humouring me. The main guy, the one I chatted to the other day, started to smile as though expecting me to add, ‘OK, guys, I admit, I’m just pulling your leg. Of COURSE it’s not really affecting me!’ I looked at him and said, ‘You don’t really give a fuck do you?’ He stopped smiling but, realising that I was serious, clearly took offence at the truth!

13 September. The builders had the radio on loud enough for me to hear it today but I didn’t find it so annoying that I snapped; just slightly irritating all day. Unpleasant on the whole though. And, I swear I could still sort of hear the irritating sound in my head for a while after they had left for the day. They turned the radio up full blast just for about 20 seconds ten minutes before they went home. These guys are like little children. They neither care nor understand how the noise is affecting me.

14 September. What they do is start work at 8 and then put the radio on or turn it up at 9.30. This morning, they turned the radio on at 9.16 a.m. – full blast at first just to scare me but then down to a reasonable volume. I can just slightly hear it. It’s sunny weather at the moment so I don’t want to close the windows and play loud music. They had turned the radio up loud by 11.30 a.m. so I decided if that was the way they wanted it fuck them! My Ruin day! Enjoy!

Apparently, a Sikh man was stabbed to death at 1.01 a.m. this morning in a neighbouring area. The killer, who was black, dragged the man’s female friend out of out of the passenger seat and then demanded the keys to his black Mercedes. The owner of the vehicle tried to hide them under his seat but the carjacker threatened to harm the woman if he did not hand them over. However, he stabbed the driver before he had a chance to retrieve the keys

16 September. I have been quiet all day but the builders brought a stereo with them which they played loudly just for a few minutes at some point. At 7.06 a.m. Ha Chu Bitch U let out a purposeful/fake sneeze.

“We have had to literally dis-identify with every aspect of being a so-called human in what the sisters have termed the ‘release of the pain/fear-body phase’ in the Phases of Embodiment article…which is why it took so freaking long…but the divinity phase they say, is much more natural to us and will feel more seamless in its unfoldment.
                So, are you ready to shine?”
                - Lauren C. Gorgo (‘Leaders of a New Humanity: the emergence,’ 20 September 2011, www.thinkwithyourheart.net/2011/09/20/leaders-of-new-humanity-the-emergence).

Another stolen quote attributed to Albert Einstein

20 September. There have been more complaints from Asian people to the local councillor about Eastern Europeans; Romanians I think. Apparently, three youths aged between ten and twelve have been hanging around the main road here causing mayhem. One resident complains that a gang confronted her two sons (of similar age) and their friend on their way home from school (behind the local supermarket) and started beating them up: “One has a black eye and the other a bloody nose.” They are very shaken up by the incident, she adds. These same three youths were taunting an old man and he was very upset, explains another resident. “Last week, they came in our driveway and when my wife asked them to leave one of them tried to hit her…I also saw them last week trying to pick a fight with an adult and they were carrying sticks with them. I am fearful that we are being put under extreme provocation by these youths and somebody is bound to react and get hurt. This is a genuine concern as these kids are becoming dangerous.”

As for the “dreadfully escalating situation of prostitution,” an English lady reports that a middle aged man approached a member of her staff at the local day nursery and offered her '£50 for three hours'! This took place in mid-afternoon and she was very upset. The councillor notes that ‘this has now become an ‘unabated thriving 24 hour business’! He says he wonders how safe the public here really are from these ‘kerb crawlers’ now operating in broad daylight. 

“I love when people underestimate me because that moment when I show them what I’m made of is priceless.” – Phoenix Rysin.

21 September. When the builders left to go home at 5 p.m. today one of them said ‘wanker’ form the pavement upon noticing that my window was open because, on my way out recently, they were watching me from the stairs and seemed keen to communicate, as though expecting a friendly greeting. Instead, I called them both wankers in a tone of controlled anger. Haha. A fake sneeze from Ha Chu at 7.30 p.m. I played fairly loud goth music for the next three hours.

A local Asian lady reports that two girls were randomly throwing stones at windows, cars and pedestrians. When she attempted to stop them, she says, they overtook her and started throwing stones at her five-year-old daughter. When she tried to stop them again, they ran over to join a big group of teenagers. She says she has seen a group of twelve-to-fifteen-year-olds smoking ‘sheesha’ in a park where young children were playing, having a negative influence on the young ones. She wants police patrolling the area to protect people. A Muslim man provides a list of some of the nuisance these kids have been causing over the last six months. He says he had to think twice about shouting at them when they tried to jumpstart his neighbour's moped because I was concerned about any repercussions in terms of damage to his property when he was away. They threw stones at his neighbour's window and, when he told them to stop, they ‘sized up to him.’ Although he is over six feet tall, he had to walk away “even though he was only asking them to stop throwing stones at his windows, to prevent them being smashed!” He reports that, on numerous occasions, these kids have picked up handfuls of decorative pebbles from his front yard (which has a gate) and thrown then across the street. One morning, his wife had told them to go away after one of these incidents. When she later returned from the local supermarket with their small child, she found a dead pigeon was buried with its legs sticking out of a pile of pebbles in their front yard! He has also witnessed some of these kids jumping up on the roof of a car parked in the driveway of the house opposite, which also has a gate, and rolling around on the roof. He adds that his own car was recently broken into and the sat nav. was stolen. His neighbours have had some plant pots containing roses stolen, too, he says. A number of different families appear to be living in the same house, he explains. The parents do not speak English. “The only adult who did speak English (a young man of 25-30 years of age) said they have absolutely no control over the kids. The kids do not listen to them, and he simply apologised.” He could, he says, list many other incidents of continued nuisance, theft and antisocial behaviour that he and other local residents have had to endure, both in broad daylight and at night. Another man says that he has confiscated sticks and poles from a group of children on many occasions, chased them off when he has seen them deflate car tires on numerous occasions and also helped children who were being bullied by them. He adds that he cannot believe, after so many complaints by local residents, that the families who are creating so much mayhem in the area have not been evicted. Well, clearly, they have been dumped there with the notion that it is as good a place as any.
 
22 September. Late morning: the more vocal of the two builders shouted ‘wanker’ twice upstairs in their empty echo love nest just like a dumbass little baby! Fake sneeze courtesy of Ha Chi at 8.37 p.m.

25 September. Sunday. Fake sneezes from Ha Chu at 11.01 a.m. and 11.26. There has been an older man and a woman working upstairs this weekend. They were here all day yesterday until gone 9 p.m. This morning I was woken up around 5.30 a.m. by a cat or fox rummaging through the rubbish in the skip in the front garden. I couldn’t get back to sleep. Then, at about 7.35 a.m. I heard the front door open! WTF?! I was tired and didn’t think it through and I could not recall or acknowledge that I had heard a key turn. All I knew was that the door had been opened and my imagination seemed to be the most accessible instrument I had to look at the situation. My rational brain was still asleep! I could only imagine that some drunk or whatever had broken in, assuming that the whole house was vacant on account of the skip outside and the mess surrounding it. I got out of bed and figured I needed to act fast before he (or they, although it was quiet so I figured it was just one person) opened the front door to my flat which I never lock when I’m at home. I put my dressing gown on and wanted to put some shoes and socks on but decided there wasn’t time. So, instead, I grabbed the wooden pole I use to open the windows (I have screwed a hook into one end). As I approached the door I hesitated for a second and then instinctively told myself not to think or question what I was doing, but just get on with it, go out there and prepare to beat whoever it was over the head (IF they did not get scared and run off, that is)! I’m serious! That’s what was in my head. I had no intention of waiting to see if I might need to defend myself. This is my fucking HOME! It’s quite fascinating, these responses to potential threats and invasions in my home. When I opened the door I saw one of those little red Henry vacuum cleaners standing on its own smiling at me in the doorway! HAHAHA. You know, the one’s with those big cartoon eyes at the front! I swear: right in the bloody doorway it was as though it had arrived all by itself! Of course, I realised immediately that one of the ‘builders’ must have arrived. Sure enough, the guy who was here yesterday came trotting down the stairs. I said something and he immediately made it very clear that he cannot speak English at all. I carried on talking and asked him what the time was, pointing to his watch. He showed me the time and I showed him the stick resting against the wall! He put two and two together and looked afraid so, making a demonstrative affirmative sound, I swiftly turned back, picked up the pole and returned to my flat, not wishing to scare the guy. I made my point: 7.30 on a SUNDAY morning! Of COURSE I wasn’t expecting builders to show up for work at that time. It never even entered my head that this guy was coming here to work today AT THIS HOUR! I hope he thinks twice before he wakes someone else up early on a Sunday morning without warning that he is going to the other flat to do his job, whatever it is that he does; tiling, plumbing, cleaning – hell I have no idea. There’s a pipe sticking out of the bathroom wall upstairs at the back of the house though so maybe all three.


When I told this funny story to someone she asked me if I was really going to whack them. I told her that I am kind of appalled really. It was not the loving thing to do exactly! I think my intention to do so also allowed space to adapt to the situation; that is, if the threat was enough to warrant it. I really just put myself in that mode, not through fear, but 'just in case.' Preparing for the worst. And my mind was telling me that there was a strong chance that it would be necessary and that I didn't want to go out there in first gear but rather in 5th gear and slow down if I thought it appropriate. My friend said I should not be appalled because I was protecting yourself. ‘Better than opening the door and have to gear up when you are still rubbing your eyes and getting dressed...right?’

“I can imagine no more comfortable frame of mind for the conduct of life than a humorous resignation.” – Somerset Maugham (A Writer’s Handbook).

“Seriousness is a sign of bad indigestion.” – Friedrich Nietzsche.

In addition to this incident, I had an argument with a proud Ashkenazi from New York on Facebook last night and he deleted me. Then, this morning, I had an argument with an Australian woman also on Facebook. I had not been up long. Result: she deleted me. Hahahaha. These two people each sent me friend requests and thought they would like me but we did not see eye-to-eye AT ALL! I’m glad they have both gone but have to say I find it all hilarious! Crazy morning!

“You ask a good question: if you’re in the middle of difficulties and problems how can you feel gratitude? And the answer is that you’ve got to fight to find the gift, even in the difficult. That’s what I was talking about earlier. When you shift your perspective from the perspective of the mind – because, I want to tell you something, life will never make sense to your mind. If you’re trying to get life to make sense with your mind, you might as well forget it because life will never make sense to your mind because mind is very logical and life is not. So, in order for life to make sense, you’ve got to be – I mean this literally – out of your mind. And you’ve got to be into your soul. But, when you begin to see life from the perspective of your soul, then, even in the midst – as I was saying earlier – even in the midst of the rest of it, you can see the gift. And, when you can see the gift, you can say, ‘Thank you God.’ ‘Thank you God for this gift which I would not have been able to perceive had I not embraced the perspective of the soul.’ But now I see that even this horrible situation is bringing to me. I even see that. But, again, I want to say something. This is important because, when you see that, when you see the gift and begin to move into gratitude, the very shift, the shift away from resisting to gratitude, changes, changes the exterior energies such that the situation improves, sometimes automatically without you doing anything. I have a favourite thing that I like to say: Life will resolve itself in the process of life – if you simply appreciate life itself. So, what I’ve learned to do is just go with the flow.” – Neale Donald Walsch (interviewed by Lilou MacĂ©, 2011, www.nealedonaldwalsch.com and www.juicylivingtoour.com).

4 October. There were people talking loudly in the street at two minutes to freaking midnight. I went to the window to have a look and it seemed to be mainly a young man talking to one of the daughters in the Turkish family next-door-but-one who was standing in the doorway. The weather was warm and I had the windows open too.

This month: “The Anti Social Behaviour Team will be holding an open surgery for residents to come and discuss any anti social behaviour related issues that they may be experiencing.” The event, which is the fourth of its kind in the Borough, apparently, will “give residents the chance to speak face-to-face with the Police and the Council’s ASB team about ASB in their area.” The newsletter continues: ASB team works closely with the Police to help tackle issues such as:

•       Nuisance neighbours
•       Rowdy and nuisance behaviour
•       Yobbish behaviour and intimidating groups taking over public space
•       Vandalism, dumping rubbish and abandoning cars
•       Begging and antisocial drinking
•       The misuse of fireworks
•       Constant dog barking, whining or howling
•       Loud parties in residential areas
•       Excessively amplified music, TV or musical equipment
•       Noisy DIY or building works outside regulated times
•       Unattended intruder alarm or vehicle alarm
•       Noise from commercial premises such as pubs, restaurants, factories etc
•       Harassment, abuse or crime targeted at you because of prejudice against your race, religion, sexuality, gender-identity, disability or age. These are called hate crimes.

[I received a formal invite through the letterbox a week later].

5 October. At 12.30 p.m., the new owner of the house met two men (probably Pakistani) and took them upstairs to see the flat. Afterwards, they talked in the street and the owner left after saying, “I don’t mind giving a bit away but…” These two gentlemen then walked across the street and knocked on No.32’s window. He greeted them warmly as though he had been expecting them and also needed their help. He then seemed to rant passionately whilst pointing in the direction of the house in which I live. It looked like he was complaining about my conflict with him and his mechanics. One of the first things he said was, “everyone in the street knows about it,” sweeping his arms from one side to the other to make his point demonstrably. Very curious! He may have been referring to my conflict with next-door or he may have meant that the whole street knows about the dispute over the sale of the empty house next door because he did point to it briefly but it could have been because he used to make use of the driveway for business purposes. Perhaps No.32 just wants to make sure that Pakistanis move in upstairs. I guess they are probably from a local estate agents and the new owner was saying he didn’t mind paying them to find a buyer – or, rather, he was agreeing to give them cash-in-hand on top of the sale. He may just have meant that he doesn’t mind coming down in price slightly. At first, I wondered if he meant that he regrets offering me the cost of a court case to move out which is what has happened. In other words, something sinister like planning to force me out at this stage. However, I’m sure this guy, who is English and not from around here does not know those know No.32 and about the situation here. I spoke to him yesterday and explained that moving was going to be a struggle for me and that I needed double the amount to start a new life somewhere. He said the amount he has agreed to is more than he wanted to give me. I also said that if they were smart they would have given me money to move out at the start but he said they weren’t bothered and just figuring out what to do with the place.


18 October. An African guy was walking towards me in the street in town and as we approached each other he suddenly walked past me on the other side, to my right, and basically walked into me, bashing my arm and shoulder roughly. Well, as I am learning, the actual incident is unimportant. What matters is my reaction. I was startled and disgusted but shook off the mixture of disbelief and wanting to retaliate physically within seconds purely because I know that anger and violence lower one’s vibration and are therefore one only succeeds in abusing oneself. So I forgave and blessed him instead. Oddly, not ten minutes later I bumped into the black guy who was on the last New Deal course with me and who was so judgemental and distrustful towards me as to border on racism. I evidently came across like white English men who just go around fucking everyone over! By contrast, I commented on his apparent poise and said he seemed like a cool guy. So, this time I reminded him that he is the guy who doesn’t like me but whom I like! He chuckled gently and shook his head, saying ‘no’ and then we chatted for five minutes. These are hard times. He told me about losing another job and I told him about the promise that is there somewhere, waiting for capitalism to draw its last breath. He found it difficult to conceive but I had him revelling in momentary hope with me for a moment or two.

20 October. I had to clean the dustbin again because there was some rainwater inside which had a strong smell of fish. Perhaps the fishes came back to life and swam away this time!

Currently spending most of my time looking for somewhere to live (as far away from here as possible)! There are still men of all ages from Pakistan/Bangladesh walking down my road late at night yelling into their mobile phones of course. The noisy, naughty Romanian kids also walk down our street sometimes, mucking about with anything they find lying about. One day, one of the boys was inviting another boy to punch him in the groin to prove that he was hard enough to endure it but he only lasted a couple of goes before giving up. I have seen them hitting their heads with pieces of wood as a display of macho heroics before as well. There is usually at least one girl in the group. On this occasion, the boy who had been doing the punching jumped up onto a wall and started pulling his trousers down. He was daring himself to expose his genitals but did not quite make it all the way. I found it quite amusing because he was right opposite my Pakistani neighbours and then jumped on the bonnet of No.32’s seven-seater before returning to the pavement. No.32 is back in business but just assesses vehicles in the street now. I hope they are working on them in a place where they are not disturbing residents. I appear to be in a place of unconditional love for my neighbours now because I am just happy to be getting out of here. They know I am moving soon and yet they are making some effort to disturb me still – right up to the end! Banging on the wall late at night, sneezing, coughing, louder TV and other stuff. They are just babies though and I’m done thinking about it or making some effort to deter them because there is no point anymore. Horrible people!

"There are things that are so serious, you can only joke about them." - Werner Heisenberg.

“A sense of humour...is needed armour. Joy in one's heart and some laughter on one's lips is a sign that the person down deep has a pretty good grasp of life.” - Hugh Sidney.

Notes from my final days in that place:

The truth is I’m in burn-out city.

When you are feeling beaten up, bashed up, it drags you down unless you are hyper-positive. There are many people in this world who just cannot take anymore and yet they have to anyway.

I told an older Asian guy in the street that he was so noisy and, when he didn’t respond because he was so engrossed in his phone conversation but grunted to see what I wanted, I told him to keep the noise down, raising my voice appropriately. On the same road, on 6 November, on the way into town, I walked past a younger Asian man who was also talking loudly on his mobile. I asked him if he was from Bangladesh and he said, ‘No, Pakistan.’ I said they’re both as bad as each other which he did not like. He seemed to know what I meant so I told him they talk loudly – in the street. It has occurred to me that I just can’t take anymore of this place. I don’t know if it’s because I am preoccupied with moving, have already moved my heart and soul to Yorkshire or because I am generally a bit stressed anyway.

On the bus there were two Asian men with personal stereos and one was loud. Both were seated but I was in the standing area. I kept looking at them both but could not figure out which was the loud one. Finally, I got eye contact with the wrong one and asked if it was him. I said it’s difficult to figure out who it is because they (meaning Asians) do not look defensive or aggressive (unlike blacks and white English males), they’re just ignorant and oblivious to other people’s space. I was on another bus one day, sitting upstairs on my own on a double decker, and two young Asian men got on the bus and sat at the back listening to loud Asian music on an mp3 player. When I saw another bus going in the same direction I quickly scurried down the stairs and got off the bus to jump on that. It was a gamble but I managed to catch it, much to my relief. Kind of reminds me of a b-movie: escaping from giant creepy crawlies or blood-sucking aliens or something.

Just before I moved, the new owners had the garden dug up and replaced with a driveway to resemble the rest of the concrete jungle. I left the pirate flag in the garden as though it was waving around defiantly despite an invasion on the last bastion of hope for the natural world in that area. I wonder how long the back garden will last! There was a guy working on the driveway on his own for the last two days. Something very mysterious and distressing happened. The day before I moved out, this guy turned up in the morning and spent a whole hour coughing and spluttering, literally with hardly any gaps between. He had not coughed once until that day and did not cough again after the hour was over. I had to listen to it in bewilderment as I lay in bed, for whilst I was warming up to do tai chi in the garden the previous day, I myself had a dry cough which I didn’t manage to clear for five or ten minutes because Ha Chu was in the garden next door and I did not want him to think I was doing it deliberately. So I attempted to clear it without making too much noise for fear of retaliation during my practice. Work that one out! I said to the guy later that my Pakistani neighbours would pay good money to someone to wake me up in the morning. I repeated myself, ‘Yeah, good money!’ He looked at me with ponderous scrutiny without saying anything. Either he was thinking that I was mad or he was trying to decide whether I was as serious as I sounded. Or…I don’t know…what if they paid him to do that? I wouldn’t put it past them and it was obvious that Ha Chu and No.32 delighted in the disturbance outside my window. No.32 offered the workers tea when the digger showed up and Ha Chu stopped to chat to this guy a few times and produced whatever charm, interest and praise he could muster, none of which I have witnessed in my 13 years of living there! But surely it couldn’t be that, could it? Alternatively, perhaps he just smoked too much (weed!) that morning because he was on his own. Weird! (Shudders).


Not long after moving, I read a message that was being circulated which claimed that the planet’s Earthstar chakra is located in London and that it had failed to open on schedule (by the end of 2011 I suppose). I took it with a pinch of salt and deleted the email. I later found myself reflecting on the notion, however. What if I and others had chosen the city as the arena for our disturbing initiations and nightmares which have supposedly led to DNA activations and clearing the heart of blockages created in the lower three chakras and so forth in order to contribute to a shift of this kind as part of the Ascension of Earth itself? Certainly, where I was living, it felt like I was stationed there as some kind of wise warrior guardian holding an energy against all odds but that, by the end, the invading forces had become so pervasive that the battle was seemingly lost. Except that, by then, the Earth had shifted sufficiently and the flow of divine energies on the planet had gathered momentum, having been anchored by old souls across the globe, so that it was only a matter of time before all would be affected and respond to the higher frequencies. They will have to face themselves and make the leap into the new energetic atmosphere or fall away with the denser energies through fear of change.

"Britain contains some of the most sacred and holiest points of divine power on the surface of this planet...Britain, therefore, is one of the great spiritual centres of the World...as the next coming of the Christ has indeed been destined to take place in Britain the Nazarene's visit to this land was intended to symbolise the next place of incarnation of the Christ Light…So, remember that Britain has had a glorious past and is a most holy and sacred land. Truly the angels have walked, and still do walk upon England's green and pleasant land. In the future Britain is to play a role which is without parallel, for which the people who now inhabit these shores have to undergo a period of transmutation, of transformation, so that in this change of the Earth that is to come, in this cataclysmic rebirth at the turn of the century, she may be ready to fulfill the true purpose of her being: the resting place of the Christ Light." (The Revelation of Ramala, 1978,
www.sacredconnections.co.uk/holyland/sacredbritain.htm).

As I was leaving the area in November, the local Council started to fund a Police Team to ‘tackle crime and anti-social behaviour and help to make sure residents feel safe.’ It will replace the Parks Police service. The team will work until 3 a.m. on Friday and Saturday nights and the contact number is a mobile one. Meanwhile, peaceful protests beckoning/celebrating the end of capitalism abound across the globe setting a positive example to those who would use the occasion as an excuse to unleash anger and violence.

“This is going to be a revolution that’s going to make a difference. It’s going to be a revolution of people, not organisations, not cooperating with their own enslavement. Individual and, yes, together collectively.” – David Icke (Essential Knowledge for a Wall Street Protestor, video, 20 October 2011).

[Retrospective note: I got wind that the Earth Star chakra which is apparently located in London did not manage to open at the required time which I think was by the end of 2011. I ignored the message when I received it but later realised that it would make sense if I and other starseeds, or ‘Light workers,’ had lived in London for a decade or two in order to help specifically with this endeavour. Furthermore, this may have been the reason we met with St Germain in London, the focus of which was healing and clearing the Earth as much as ourselves. The work was all related. Now it appears that Natalie Glasson will be gathering people on 16 June 2012 to cleanse and purify the Earth Star Chakra. “The Earth Star Chakra, Causal Chakra, Soul Star Chakra and Stellar Gateway Chakra must be activated simultaneously as they work in harmony,” according to Natalie. “The three higher chakras anchor and express Creator vibrations through the Earth Star Chakra and the Earth Star Chakra can trigger the Stellar Gateway Chakra when all chakras are balanced to achieve ascension. The Earth Star Chakra overseen by Archangel Sandalphon holds the Kundalini source of energy for the world and can manifest light into the physical reality of the Earth…The activation of the Earth Star Chakra can cause a release of primal fear and intense fear patterns which can be sent into all the chakras of the Earth to be overcome and released. We wish to dissolve these fears so that only light is released into all the chakras of the Earth. The Earth Star Chakra needs to be aligned with the heart chakra of the Earth in Glastonbury and the three higher chakras of the Earth. These preparations will allow for the Earth Star Chakra to achieve the appropriate shifts, awakening of life force energy, kundalini and wisdom during the time of the Olympics achieving a further activation in December 2012.” And Mother Mary communicated through Natalie: “Many chakras of the Earth are activating and awakening, including the Earth Star Chakra in London, it is important that intentions of perfect and protected light activations are created at this time to support the activations of the Earth Star Chakra and other chakras. The Olympics held in London UK is assisting with the activation of the Earth Star Chakra which will allow for the kundalini energy of the Earth to flow into and magnify each chakra therefore creating a deep awakening for all. So many other major situations and synchronicities are occurring from now until the New Year, each requires your intentions, your support and love.” - Mother Mary (‘Mother Goddess Creator Intention Weaving,’ channelled through Natalie Glasson, 23 July 2012, www.omna.org). I recommend this upgrade: Downloading Your New Earth Star Chakra - Capsule 105].

“You grow up the day you have your first real laugh, at yourself.” - Ethel Barrymore.

“Yes, when you see for the first time, a great laughter arises in you - the laughter about the whole ridiculousness of your misery, the laughter about the whole foolishness of your problems, the laughter about the whole absurdity of your suffering.”- Osho.


So, I had an emotional crisis when Pluto was transiting my Moon and then both a continued emotional crisis, still relating to the neighbours, and a financial crisis when it moved on to my Mars. I have underplayed the latter because, although the two were always related, my financial troubles started at a later date than the emotional neighbour issues. It has, nevertheless, been a source of deep pain and despair for me. Financially, at the moment, it feels like I’m walking on a cliff edge and if I fall no one will save me but, at the same time, this may also be the time when I learn, or get, to fly. Where did I leave my wings?

Well, my long ‘endurance test’ – or process through which darkness was able to surface from within me to be released in this lifetime - finally ended. According to the Pleiadians via Lauren C. Gorgo, 2012 marks the “completion of our 12 year initiation/discipleship…which actively began in 1999 (the beginning of the Galactic 8th wave according the Mayans).“ She adds that, “We are now in our 13th year of transformation (Mayan cycles move in 13 year rotations) the resonance of which ends/begins a whole cycle of human experience. We have also activated our 12 strand DNA/12th-dimensional blueprint bodies, which is what marks the true beginning of Christed-consciousness on the planet…those who have completed the reconnection of their 12th dimensional blueprint are undergoing the activation of the 13th strand of DNA this year, which they refer to as ‘the strand of LOVE’…Apparently, our 12th dimensional blueprint bodies were activated on the recent 12:12 stargate and the 13th strand…which I interpret as an overlay of our 12…was activated on the solstice and will continue to ripple thru us in waves until the December solstice of 2012. The PHC [Pleiadian Higher Council] say that the solstice point is what triggered the activation and transition from discipleship to mastership for those at the forefront.” (‘2012: Think With Your Heart!’ 10 January 2012, www.thinkwithyourheart.net/2012/01/10/2012-think-with-your-heart). Certainly, I did feel the energy of Source within myself for a couple of days after 12 December and then entered 2012 in a more positive and hopeful frame of mind, purposeful in my intention to guide and inspire people this year and eager to embody the Christ. It felt like, amidst or in the aftermath of all the stress and hassle of moving house, the rail track was repositioned to allow the train of destiny to switch over to the new world of love and light even though I had been derailed and found myself seriously struggling to get to my feet again. In fact, I almost thought I was out for the count when, mysteriously, I just suddenly woke up again and got to my feet as though nothing had happened…still injured and disgruntled on the outside but newly aligned with the energy and blueprint of the Golden Age we are creating, with the new crystalline grid upon which it is to be founded. The Winter Solstice completed our journey to new Earth and, furthermore, says Lauren, the button for Human 2.0 was pressed on 22 December 2011 and heart-focused people shall now be the ones who are empowered to lead the world. The Creator has created a shift to the heart for humanity which will now begin to change this world by empowering heart-focused people. Love, not fear, will now rule on Earth as She ascends to Light this year.

“The main message of the PHC for 2012 is that we can no longer rely on our mental processing alone to sustain us. There is a new (LOVE) dynamic now in place that everyone…whether consciously or not…will have to abide by.

‘To those contributing to the collective growth and evolution of the planet, we say this…your time has come. There is a new energetic in place and one that is only supported by love-based intentions. Those at the forefront, those who have been diligent and steadfast in embodying LOVE, are now in position to reclaim stewardship of the planet. No longer will the forces of evil be upheld for the new constitution of earth is LOVE.’ – Pleiadian Higher Council.”

- Lauren C. Gorgo (ibid.).

“I promise you this…

If you become wholly committed to awakening from the dream you have dreamt since the stars first began to appear in the heavens and if your one desire is to be only what God created, then lay at the altar of your heart with every breath, everything you think you know, everything you think you need, and look lovingly upon every place that fear has made a home in your mind, and allow correction to come. It will come. Regardless of how you experience it, it will come. And the day and the moment will arise and all of your pain and fear and suffering will have vanished like a wind that pushes the foam of the wave away, revealing the clarity of the ocean beneath you. You will literally feel throughout your being that there never was a dream. Some memories might remain with you and you will know that somewhere you must have dreamt a dream or had a thought of wondering what it would be like to be other than the way God created you, but it will be such a faint echo that it will leave no trace upon you. In your heart you will smile gently regardless of the circumstances in which you find yourself. There will be peace from the crown of the head to the tips of the toes, and that peace will walk before you wherever you go. It will enter a room before you enter it with a body, and those who are becoming sensitive will wonder who has come into their place. And some will even say, ‘Behold, I believe Christ has come for dinner.’ And you will be that One, for that is who you are - Christ eternal.” – Jeshua (channelled through Jayem, The Way of Mastery, Heartfelt Publishing, 1997, www.wayofmastery.com).

“In our lower three chakras are ruling us, you know, our power centres, our needs, our desires, our survival fears, then we’re cutting ourselves off. But, if we’re in our higher self, the higher self informs the rest of our being and it enlightens the rest of our being. If we’re in our higher consciousness, we’re not in survival so much. We don’t feel that pain, that desperation. We feel trust. We trust our higher selves, we trust the Divine Plan. We trust how everything’s unfolding, we feel that positivity…[we] can cocreate and make things happen.” – Laura Magdalene Eisenhower (interview with Alfred Lambremont Webre, 2014).

“Beloved one, it is a great, great step for humankind when you allow yourself to awaken in the morning and say, ‘I Am the realised Christ. I Am the awakened Christ. I will be happy in this day. I will go freely in this day. Bring it on. I want it all.’ And when you say that, it will all come.” – Jeshua (channelled through Judith Coates, www.oakbridge.org).

“Laughter is the greatest wealth and the deepest love.” – Me.

"A man isn't poor if he can still laugh." - Raymond Hitchcock.

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